Starting to get low on money! Help!!! I need serious advice before I start going crazy. So here's a (quick) little back story. My dad was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis, heart disease, and starting to get dementia. He now has to be on oxygen 24/7. Before he got diagnosed with all these things, he was pretty religious. But AFTER, he got really really religious. He would sit in our living room doing rituals and telling us that we could not disturb him. He would refuse to eat or take his medication (he's also diabetic) until he was done doing these rituals. Which included, grabbing his knees, putting his arms in the air, touching certain spots on his plate repeatedly. And for the past few years he's been sending money to this church show that he is obsessed with. And lately he's been increasing the payments. My parents are trying to move and with him sending all this money every single month, they can't afford fixing the house to sell it. We have talked to him about his numerous times, but he insist on sending money, and that it's more important than anything else. We do in fact have power of Starting to get low on money!attorney and could cancel the card (which we are probably going to do) but we are all afraid of what he's going to do if we do cancel it. He threatens to not eat or take his medication if we do anything to stop the payments. And once we even had the fire department come to the house and almost had to sedate him in order to get him to the hospital to take medication (he had refused to take it for a few days and was really acting strange.) The entire process was so stressful and heartbreaking! so now my family is just really confused on what we should do!! Advice?! Please! We feel bad taking all of his rights away, he's 74 and really isn't bad shape besides the fibrosis problem. I just need an outsiders opinion. Thank you!
On the other side of the coin, watching the shows keeps your Dad busy. Maybe start narrowing down how many hours he is watching it. Is he watching the Jimmy Swaggart Ministries network SBN on cable? Find something else for him to watch, like the old reruns of TV westerns, or sports.
I would cancel that credit card. Tell Dad it was compromised, someone else is using it, and you will get a new card.... but the new card has been declined because of credit issues that you need to straighten out.... just keep making excuses. Sometimes we need to fib to help save them from themselves.
What does "is getting dementia" mean? That he has been diagnosed with dementia and is in the earliest stage?
Notify Swaggart he'll get no more money and if he continues to harass your father, you'll contact the police and ask for assistance in getting an injunction against him.
I wouldn't normally recommend that mental stability be addressed by a doctor, absent other signs of dementia, but clearly your father not thinking straight, and there may be something else going on.
You are going to have to take action. After you do, you'll wonder what took you so long. It's not easy to go against your fathers wishes, but You can't let him hold your mom hostage with his behavior. It's about the whole family, not just him. If he acts out and has an event, be prepared with an action plan. But meanwhile Cancel the card. Turn off the cable. Limit the bank funds. Put moms money in a separate account. Do something. Add antidepressants or anxiety meds. Don't wait for the anti to go up. Start with the dr. and see what help you can find there.
As you have already said, it's getting worse. He needs your help to break the cycle if possible. His rituals sound like OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). Poor guy. He sounds like he's just trying to do the best he can. If he should need Medicaid in the future, his gifting could cause problems with that as well.
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