How do I get emergency power of attorney for my disabled, abused mother?

I really like the idea of booking an immediate ticket and making a surprise visit as mentioned here. If you can afford to do so, do it now. I also agree with the idea of making Sonny boy's life miserable to the point he cooperates. He's not entitled to her money, especially if she's getting Social Security. If she is getting Social Security or any other government benefit, report the fraud right away. For financial abuse, call Social Security and report the fraud and tell everything you know and give all information. If he's using her food stamp card, call that provider and report fraud and mention everything you mentioned here, that she's not getting fed and she's in horrible shape due to abuse by the abuser. You know his name and where he lives, give all that information, too. Definitely start proceedings to put a stop on her account and to start money and asset recovery if he stolen assets from her. Be careful who you hire for asset recovery, some of them are faulty such as some of them in Michigan as far as I saw on Facebook. Your best bet is to call your State Bar Association and get an eldercare lawyer involved as well as the APS and cops. If the cops won't do nothing, call your State civil rights commission if the cops say "it's a civil matter". Start rattling some cages until you get the results that are supposed to come. Keep rattling cages until all the wrongs are made right and don't back down. Stand strong and get a support network behind you

Book a ticket immediately. Make a surprise visit. If he won't let you in call the police and tell them you need a welfare check on her NOW. File a police report. They can get her to temporary safety. A judge can give you temporary guardianship until you get things in place with an eldercare attorney. An alternative would be to call a nursing home, talk to the director and ask her what your next steps should be to protect her. Another option would be taking her to the ER. By law they have to protect her and their social worker or nurse navigator can help you with the next steps. If Sonny Boy gives you any trouble let him know you will file a complaint against him with the police for elder abuse and you will testify against him in Court. Make it so unpleasant for him, he'll be glad to be rid of her. Get pictures, pictures, pictures. Video if possible.

What you just described are very obvious signs of abuse. I see what's going on just from your description and you need to get the cops and APS involved. You also need an elder care attorney and you really need to go for emergency court ordered guardianship in this case.

What's really going on:
He's neglecting her in order to save as much money as possible by neglecting her needs and spending money on her so he can have more to himself.  This is a big red flag. Abusers often start on vulnerable people when they know the potential victim has no one living nearby who can protect them. This can also happen in the  case where the person has no family, so the abuser just moves right on in and makes their move. Even if there is a family and they live pretty far away and may not even be in contact with the potential victim, this is where vultures use this as an opportunity to play out their strategy for self benefit. This is why her bills are not being paid and she is not getting medical care or other needs met. Meeting her needs would mean less money for him, which is why she's rarely fed (food is expensive).

I think there's a strong possibility he may very well be living large at her expense. If he smokes or drinks, there goes a good chunk of her money. If you see him showing up with a new car or other new stuff, that may also be coming out of her money.

If she's on the verge of eviction or utility cut off, blame him.

* What you need to do now is get an eldercare lawyer involved and put a lien on all of his property and bank accounts and regain as much of her money as possible.

* Find out where her bank is an alert the bank to what's been going on. Take with you any unpaid bills and any bank statements you can get a hold of. Request to talk with the manager and tell them about the elder financial abuse. They should be trained and what to look for where financial abuse is involved whether intended or not. Sometimes financial abuse can be mistaken for simply just taking out a certain amount of cash and paying some stuff in cash, make sure of this before assuming financial abuse in any case. What you need to do though is alert the bank and they may want to know how long this is been going on so they can check any records and even video surveillance of any ATM use with her card. They'll have a record of her bank card number and they'll know if someone else used her card. In some cases though, people grant access to their bank accounts and even lend out their cards. Be aware of this when pursuing this but I think there's probably some financial abuse going on, and he shouldn't be given the benefit of doubt or even be allowed access to her bank account. What needs to be done right now is to block his access to her bank account and even have the bank put a temporary block on her account. Yes, they can temporarily freeze or stop your account. In the case of fraud which is what you're describing, they would be able to temporarily freeze her bank account and stop all transactions.
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* What you can also do is move her money to a new account and close the old one.

* When paying her bills, setting up bills to be paid automatically online is the safest way to assure your bills are paid even on days you can't get out to pay them or when you would rather be elsewhere doing something else.
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* Be sure though to set the bills up one by one on your end and don't let companies come after the money, this is where so many people have been ripped off.
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* If they won't give you a copy of the bill, that's a huge red flag. Don't do business with that particular company. Don't argue with them over the phone, just hang up, no matter what they say and even if they use a scare tactic. Just firmly stand your ground and say "no one gets access to my bank account." Keep repeating it no matter what they say. If they still persist, just hang up. With enough people doing this, eventually companies will get the message if it's a strong enough one.

I went digital years ago, it's the best thing I ever did with my money where bills are involved. I don't carry cash anymore and haven't for quite some time and less I owe a private party which is rare. I try to keep cash in the bank and out of my wallet as much as possible.

As for the physical abuse, I'm a survivor myself and I can tell you what it's like to fear your abuser, and yes, it sounds like she really is scared even for her life. She knows that whatever conditions she has, she could die from if they're serious enough.

* It sounds to me like he's deliberately neglecting her just to get her to die so she'd be out of his way and the money and anything else valuable would all be his. This is his way of saving as much money so he can spend it on himself and live large at her expense. Don't let this happen. What you need to do is go to her location but have the local cops in her area meet you at the house and just remove her from the home if the home is in his name. If the home is in her name, have him removed from her home especially if he's not paying her rent, then he's a squatter. Find out who's name the home is in, and just remove whoever shouldn't be there.
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* When involving the cops, see if you can first gather all paper trails of unpaid bills and missing money from her account and even where the bank has put a stop on her account. Then see if you can get proof of emergency guardianship from the court. You may very well need the help of the APS to get this ball rolling right away. Don't let his bad behavior continue another day because if she needs emergency treatment now, she could be dead tomorrow.
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* Speak to the EMTs in her area and tell them what you told us and have her taken to the ER and fully examined. If she's malnourished, they'll know right away especially if they can see her skeletal system through her skin. The hospital will definitely be able to help you get the ball rolling and get her some proper protections in place. Keep all of these records as well and get as many statements from doctors as possible and keep those handy.

Again, a lawyer really needs to be involved and be able to put liens on any assets he has and freeze his bank account. If he tries to sell any property, the lawyer should be able to put a stop on that by court order. What needs to happen is everything he has should be liquidated and all of the money he spent on himself should be returned to her and put into her bank account. What you may need to do is see if she'll let you put your name on her account but only as a trustee.

Another idea is to see if the bank can keep a close eye on her account and alert you if there's anything suspicious on record. 

Finally, if she has any insurance policies especially life insurance, be very wary, he may have been coercing her and she may have already signed over her life insurance to him as the beneficiary when she's gone. Another thing to be wary of is if he may have taken out a life insurance policy on her while this has been going on. He may have intent to either kill her or call her to die a slow agonizing death through the neglect that you're describing. 

The squeaky wheel gets the grease, so get very loud over this and don't back down. Alert all of her neighbors of what's going on and get some attention. Somewhere along the line someone will step in and back you up. She's probably been isolated from friends and family anyway, alert everyone she knows and the rest of the family to what's going on. Get as much attention as possible and draw as much attention to the abuser as possible by alerting everyone to what's going on. Draw as much attention to this as absolutely possible and people will come out of the cracks to help put a stop to this

Have you been there yourself and seen her, asked her, if you think she won't be able to talk freely with him around, take her for an outing, maybe just out to lunch, or a park, it might be as simple as hiring a woman to come in and give a bath, and help take care of her to give him a break, but you need an outside witness who has nothing to gain. As a male care taker for my mother and father in law. There are limits to what I will do. I have a woman give my mother in law a bath, unless it is an emergency I don't go any further than to take her to the bathroom and I avert my eyes. As for meals I'm not a cook I have a sister in law that makes the meals ahead of time and I keep it warm, or reheat. I do have problems getting them to eat sometimes so we keep an alternative meal . What exactly is being bought ? sometimes the elderly will buy things out of security, or boredom. My father in law kept buying new locks because he would lose the keys. He had an allowance, but found myself paying for a lot of meds and other items out of my own pocket, could it be some type of reimbursement, How is he paid it doesn't sound like she can be left alone. So perhaps he should have a small credit card or gift card to pay for her items. I am not saying that he is not taking advantage of her. My brother stayed with my mother, and kept her and our business account cleaned out. I didn't find out till going over the books and checking account as her executor of her estate. So I would suggest digging deeper, ask questions, see if he needs help with the bathing and cooking. No doubt that something needs to be done as soon as possible, whether it's a simple adjustment to how things are done, or to be removed from the situation.

The first thing to do to get her removed from her current location is to call the elder abuse number listed in this discussion by another member. It's odd that this has not been done already if she is in danger. If mom is truly in danger and this isn't just about money, get an attorney and call that number.

You live in NJ and she is in PA. How often do you see her? Have you seen this abuse or just believe you could do a better job? Yes call Protective Services and ask them to check things out. If it is your Mom who complains, remember this is sometimes part of dementia and may not be true. It is very stressful to be a caregiver, they get abused more than you may think and it requires patience and a lot of work. Think twice

Have you tried calling 911 in her area? Let the EMTs evaluate her and transport her to the hospital. Much easier to deal with a situation like this once she's out of the house.

Call Adult Protective Services and report elder abuse. The number for Pennsylvania is 800-490-8505. It's a 24 hour hotline. She definitely meets the criteria for elder abuse. Financial and physical.

From a second post
"She lives in Pa and I live in NJ, I need to get her to NJ so I can protect her. She is barely fed, never washed, all her money is being spent, but not on the bills. She is in extreme danger"

The attorney would need to be knowledgable for both states if you are wanting to move your mother to NJ. Is she living in her own home now? Who is abusing her? A sibling, a step father, your dad? Is your mother competent?

Is your mother able to sign a power of attorney? Does anyone else have power of attorney now? It's very easy for your mother to sign for you to be her power of attorney if she is competent to do so. When you use the word emergency it makes me think you are referring to emergency guardianship. This is used when your mother is no longer able to make decisions for herself and can't appoint you as her power of attorney. Give more information about your situation in order to get a more correct answer. Either way, a NAELA certified elder attorney could help you get the documents you need to take care of your mother.

Your mother can assign you to be her Power of Attorney as long as she is able to understand the legal document. If yes, go to an Elder Law Attorney have a Power of Attorney put into place.