Trying to make this short. I'm 36, my mom is 80 and has Lewy Body dementia. I became her "guardian of the person" in December 2011 after a court battle with my brother (I am adopted, he's my mom's only birth child left living--he's 56). I had to become her permanent guardian after her dementia got very bad, she stopped bathing, eating, buying food, and was hoarding dogs in a condemned house. Once I started the proceedings, my brother fought me tooth and nail to try to get custody of her. Thankfully he didn't because the clerk of court asked him why he never took her out of such a bad situation once he saw how bad she was doing. Fast forward to a year after this court decision--my mom has been steadily getting worse with her dementia. She sees people who aren't there, her conversation is all over the place, she does not bathe herself as good as she should, though I watch her bathe, and she has become increasingly combative--to the point where I have to hide knives and all sharp objects in my bedroom after using them. She only get's $1,320 per month through social security and I am her representative payee. She doesn't own anything...but this is the problem....Over 30 years ago, she bought some land and a single-wide trailer for my brother and his wife as a wedding present (before I ever came into the family). She has never ever lived at this residence, and never ever got the title/deed changed over to my brother and his wife's name...and they are 5 years behind on the taxes on the trailer and land ($1,076 exactly). My brother and his wife have a deed, but I found out at the tax office that because that deed was never filed with their office, that they don't own the property---my mother still does. My mom's mental health is getting worse by the day and I see I will be needing to put her in a nursing home within the next 3 months, if not sooner. I want to know how do I go about doing that? I have been so many different things....that the trailer and land in her name will be taken by the state if I put her in a nursing home--which to be honest, I don't care about. I care about my mom's health and getting her the care she needs. I was told she won't qualify for Medicaid to cover the expense....I need to find some answers quickly so I can get my mom some help. She is up every night in a rage with this dementia and I am seeing that I can't give her the medical and professional help she needs. We live in North Carolina by the way....if ANYONE can give me some help and advice, I would greatly appreciate it. This situation is getting worse by the day....Thank you..... --Maria in NC
Since you know which NH, set up an appointment with them. They might also help you and/ or give you some other options (for dealing with Medicaid and other funding possibly).
I'm also in love with this website. It's been a godsend!
My cousin and I toured the facility and we love it. It's very clean and the atmosphere is nice. We were told to not see my mom and let her get used to the atmosphere of the place and the residents. However, when my cousin and I went to the bathroom before we left, my mom accidentally saw us (but she was smiling and talking with the other residents--which made me very happy). On our way out of the facility, a nurse helped to distract my mom so she wouldn't see us leaving. I am sooooooooooooo thankful that my mom is placed where she needs to be. I went thru HELL to get her the help she needs. Now my focus is to get a job quickly so I don't lose my apartment, so I am presently looking and applying for whatever jobs I see in my area. Thank you all for your support, advice, and help in this situation. God knows I needed it. I'm very happy now, and I can continue on with my life---knowing that my mom is well taken care of.
And honestly, I'm not getting that doctor at all...I mean, what gives? Is the man blind to the situation? Or just plain stupid? He knows what's up. Does he want you to prove bodily harm before he makes a move? I'd have had a few choice words for him that would have left his ears ringing... Good luck!
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