How can we make her feel safe? She is very afraid at night. She is 86 and moved to Independent Living after living in her home for 60 years. She started hallucinating in her home, so we moved her to my sisters. That worked for a while, but it was extremely difficult for my sister and her husband's marriage. My sister found a wonderful Independent Living environment for her. Mom loves her apartment, but the hallucinations have begun again. She believes she is being watched and filmed and then she says the footage is being played back to her. She is extremely terrified and does not want to stay there. These hallucinations began in her home and now on to her new living experience. What can we do? We realize that we can not convince her that her experiences aren't real. We have tried so many different things. It seems that her fears from childhood have now become her reality. It seems that the hallucinations become more apparent when she has slept all day and can not sleep at night. My sister is going to try and keep her awake all day so that she can sleep at night, but my sister cannot do this on a daily basis as she has a job. I live 6 and 1/2 hours away. Would medication given at night to help her sleep resolve any of this? She has started to see a geriatric primary care physician. We are at a loss and feel so helpless. What a terrifying way to live. Does anyone have any suggestions? Right now, it seems the only thing to do is move her back to my sister's, however, that leaves mom home alone all day with no social interaction. Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated.
All of you who answered this question need to understand that dementia affects the brain and can cause hallucinations. No amount of good intentions, positive or rational thinking, nutritional supplements, holistic practice or anything else will stop those hallucinations except for pharmaceuticals prescribed by a psychiatrist. You cannot wish them away. And they are frightening. So once you've ruled out physical causes such as urinary infections, take your loved one to a neurologist or eldercare psychiatrist or other qualified medical specialist who can properly diagnose the dementia and prescribe medication to control hallucinations. They will prescribe the smallest dosage to treat the problem. Any possible side effects are superceded by the positive effects in not being constantly afraid and flooding the body with chemicals produced by extreme feelings of constant fear.
Jane, you need eldercare specialists like a neurologist to help your mother. Good luck to both of you. I hope you can convince your mother that the whole point is to mask the symptoms which cannot be cured or alleviated otherwise.
Also, does your mom have any sight loss? My mom has macular degeneration and the docs have all agreed that she has Charles Bonnet Syndrome--where the brain decides to send out its own images because it's not receiving the image from the eye. After a lot of consultations with both the geriatric doc and the eye doc, they agreed that the hallucinations are probably a manifestation of the CBS. She still might see things when she's feeling "fine," but is able to discern whether it's real or not. When the infection or pain comes along, poof...no more ability to think rationally.
Good luck...I sincerely hope you can find some answers.
The Hallmark channel has the "Golden Girls" comedy series [it will back back on in January] and I will watch that to help me go to sleep... now I am of the age where I can relate to the show :)
When my Dad use to get upset over his confused thinking, I use to turn on the weather channel and that would help snap Dad out of his confusion for awhile. If there is a tornado chaser show on, even better. His hobby was weather watching.
I think you're on the right track; it's just finding the right solution, or combination there of.
Good luck.
Second, I can't offer any advice on meds for sleeping; I've only taken Melatonin (which had no side effects for me) and something like Nytol - but a few times was enough of that b/c of the groggy hangover. I have taken herbal teas; I've used soft, soothing music - that's been the most helpful.
I also look at relaxing photos of gardens or crafts before I go to bed.
Second, I think changing her sleeping and awake hours is a good suggestion, but perhaps do it an hour at a time - help her up an hour earlier during the day until the day and night patterns are normalized. Speak with Admins at the IL and see if they can help make this shift.
Perhaps if they can keep her busy with activities and socialization during the day she'll be tired enough to sleep at night.
Third, I think it's normal to have fears in childhood, but parents are there to comfort us. Now she's in IL and doesn't have that comfort. Perhaps you could talk to the staff to see if there are ways they address this with others, or ways in which someone can periodically stop by her room to comfort her at night.
You might even get a "huggie" - a soft, fluffy animal pet; it might help console her.
Have you tried asking one of the staff to play a soft, comforting "easy music" CD for her at bedtime? Harp music, lapping waves, rustling trees...those kinds of CDs are available for bedtime relaxation.
Fourth, I would contact the geriatric physician and raise the issue.
Fifth, I also use aromatherapy. I have a new herbal facial cream with delicately blended myrrh, frankincense, rosewood, lavender and other fragrances. It's so soothing that it helps me fall asleep very quickly.
I used to and sometimes still take a jar of cinnamon from my spice cabinet when I go to the ER, as well as my precious jar of another eastern spice blend of skin cream. It helps me relax.
In the meantime when Dad was talking about ants, to smooth his thinking, I was telling him we are having problems with sugar ants [even though we didn't]. That made him feel better. Even the Staff came in and placed ant traps, and that also helped for the invisible ants.
If it turns out not to be an UTI, then ask her primary doctor for something to calm her nerves... if she doesn't like taking pills, tell her they are vitamins.
I had placed a lot of night lights around Dad's apartment, as he was use to that when he lived at home. I also had his bedroom furniture set up the same way he had at home, so when he would wake up at night, he felt more comfortable.