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If you have someone living with your loved one what do you expect of that person? Do you have them interact with your loved one other than cooking for them? Do live in take dementia patients out to senior centers for activities to use their minds? Do they have the loved one help around the house? Exercise with them? What is expected of a live in caretaker who is not family?

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On calls... I have had a problem with the aides not answering the phone. So I called at differnet times to get her. When I went to the agency to complain they said I called to much. I told them never got thru and had printed out phone call listing of calls and when they did get thru. The aide now answers the phone or the answering machine now all of asudden works all the time.
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I have a caregiver that says she can't cook, I think it's more she won't cook. If you don't nip problems in the bud they can get out of hand mighty fast. If she ever combed my Mother's hair I think I would have a heart attack! Trouble is I don't write the check so she doesn't even have the courtesy of returning my texts when I am concerned that I can't get thru to my Mother on the phone. She is just plain rude.
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Go through a reputable agency who will work with you to find the right fit.
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I have my internet blocked but boy does mine love to put on the TV and I saw her snitching my Moms food right off her plate ! She isnt even a live in. She will load the sink with dishes and walk away, not even rinse, and walk past a load of towels that need folding. How many times can you tell them, they dont care! No one else will work weekends or do heavy lifting and we have to be desperate sometimes. Am I venting? Yup, thanks!
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I have taped on my wall a list of chores that each caregiver is expected to do.
I have three different women and they have different gifts.
Each does at least three loads of wash. All make sure the bed, bathroom, and kitchen are clean.
One is encouraged to go on walks.
One is encouraged to do outings to the park or store.
One is encouraged to have Dorathea work with her in the yard.

All three know that for me mom's safety, cleanliness and happiness comes before chores always. So if she is a cranky bug, keep it simple.

When I was hiring, one agency told me not to have a live-in. Because they were having problems with the long-term live-in's getting tooooo comfortable and laying around a lot. Now that I have had the same young woman every friday night for a year, I get that. She was constantly skyping on her Ipad. I have had to really get firm and structured with her.
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I am a hired caregiver and I do everything that is needed for the care of my patient. That includes: feeding, bathing, medications, preparing meals, cleaning, exercise, companionship and any other duty asked of me by my patient or their family. It is hard to find good caregivers who actually care but there are wonderful people out there, you just have to find yours. Best of luck to you!
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create a care plan together
include details about routines
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Be explicit with your expectations! If the aide is not fulfilling them have the agency send someone else.
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Be very clear about what you want them to do... do not assume they will act as if this is thier home also....
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Be explicit, people can be SO lazy about making beds, loading or unloading dishes, sweeping their floor, sterilizing toilet afterwards, the list goes on and on. I have come across some real beauts! Them caring for your loved one can become a full-time job for you, lol.
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You'd decide in the contract what their duties are, but certainly interacting with them, taking them out if the person with AD enjoys outings, playing games or music, likely toileting and shower or bathing if the help is needed, feeding if that's required. The idea is that you decide and lay out in writing and the person hired agrees.
If you have the kind of person you'd really like, certainly interacting with the person with AD would go without saying, but it's still best to include that in writing. The person should know if/when he or she is off duty and on duty, though likely if they are there, emergencies are taken care of no matter what. I hope you find a good person.
Carol
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