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I have a couple I've known over 40 years who live in my town. They have been wonderful friends, including me for holiday events and I know their adult children/grands as well. The husband is extremely intelligent and is an ordained minister. He knows world history and they have traveled the globe the last 20 years. He retired recently at 72 from a lengthy technology career.



Easter weekend, things suddenly turned. I got a weird email from him, saying he "cured himself" from a "serious brain illness." He rambled on, making no sense. I just ignored it.



His wife called me frantic last week, about him being in the hospital...that he suddenly was having a "manic episode." She said he was wound up, could hardly talk coherently, and was obsessed with his political views, so had been writing to the local paper, who was publishing his numerous rattling letters. She said he had done other things, such as run to the store, return and leave the car running in the garage! She said he was acting crazy, but if she said the word "crazy" he got very hostile and angry! He was acting combative, and spent the week calling and sending out bizarre texts and emails, including to his former colleagues. His sister got a similar email like mine, and called him out on it.



I suggested she take him to Urgent Care to get checked for a UTI. She took him to the hospital, who admitted him for 3 days of testing. After CT scan, MRI, blood work, spinal tap....they found NOTHING. He's also diabetic, and controls it very well. They released him home Friday with a parcel of drugs to take, saying he had a "Manic Episode." ??? He would be getting "counseling" for 6 weeks. Seriously?



Saturday morning, he got up and dressed, took the car to come to my home, to get my copy of his Letter to the Editor (published that Thursday) that he missed. His wife was warning me he was headed here and she couldn't stop him! I said I wouldn't answer my door, since I don't for unexpected visitors anyway. I turned the TV down, curtains drawn. I heard the doorbell. He started to knock...rapid fire like a machine gun! Then he began thumping HARD on my door, then back to machine gun knocking! It was disturbing and frightening. I called her cell (after 5 minutes of non-stop banging) and told her to get him off my porch, before I call the police....call his phone and tell him I'm out shopping and not home for hours. More rapid knocking and thumping so hard, I was glad I have a steel front door!



He finally stopped and left. I felt my blood pressure spike, and was very upset at such a violent intrusion by someone who would never do such a thing. His wife said the various doctors didn't really give her a definite answer. It reminded me of dementia, but wasn't. She is going through her older brother dying from liver cancer, has her Mom (85) living with them the last 2 years, so has her hands full. I was supportive as possible.



Not much on the Web about this "Manic" DX, especially happening at age 73...out of nowhere! I felt the INTENSE knocking and couldn't believe it myself. I'm scared of being around him now. She said he was impossible to reason with, she was obviously scared and upset herself. She is a soft spoken wife, they never fight or have issues. I'm worried about her and the stress she is under.



I need advice, comments or anything anyone can tell me about this "medical condition." This is a new one for me.

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How awful!

Sounds manic as you say, but why???

UTI, stroke, blood work - all sorts of things already ruled out. Medications? Diabetic complication? Kidney function? Brain Tumour?

I guess your friend will have to keep calling 911 everytime he goes strange. For the safety for both of them (& you).

I hope a reason can be found soon & treated.
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Dawn88 Apr 8, 2024
Beatty,
All his extensive tests showed NOTHING. He was given some meds, but was already missing doses. I told his wife she will have to go into caregiver mode, track his meds and bring them to him, including watch him actually take them.
I hope the reason is found and can be treated.
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Dawn,

I am so sorry about your friend.

I am glad that the wife warned you about his visit. It was a wise decision not to open up the door for him.

His wife must be on pins and needles dealing with this change in behavior.

The first thing I thought of was a UTI. I suppose it could be manic episode. I wonder what meds were prescribed for him.

I agree with Beatty about calling 911 if needed. I hope that they figure this out soon.
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I wonder how he thought he “cured” his brain disease, if he took something? He must have noticed he was having problems. I would think his wife should look for alternate housing for her mother to move her out of this environment and give her an opportunity to focus on DH.

According to Cleveland Clinic this could go on for months until the treatment calms him.

I would be so afraid for him to be driving, for the police to be called etc. but he may need to be hospitalized until he can get this under control.


https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/21603-mania#outlook-prognosis
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He will probably need to have his condition managed with medication.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3122555/

https://www.aplaceformom.com/caregiver-resources/articles/mental-illness-or-dementia
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Dawn88 Apr 8, 2024
Geaton,
I saw the same article and bookmarked it for his wife.
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I have a good friend /neighbor that acted really strange after a probably TIA event. Lost his car at the mall, called the police because he thought it was stolen. His brother suddenly died of blood clots, he had a lot going on at the time. I know his wife was going through a really hard time with him. Horrible anger inside, id get strange texts from him during the night. Not as bad bad as what you are going through, but it wasn't good.

He was only 70, anyways they put him on Prozac and Wellbutrin, and he is back to being his old self.

He is my walking partner, he was a mail man, so a great walker and he is completely back to the same walking partner I had before his incident at the mall.
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What "brain disease" did he think he was cured of?

Was he on meds before that he stopped taking?
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XenaJada Apr 8, 2024
I bet he was
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If he ever comes to your door like that again, please call 911. This will probably actually help his wife, since they will take him to the ER and probably hospital psych ward and start working on meds to calm him (as long as she doesn't discharge him and allow him home). She herself should be doing this, not sure why she doesn't...

About 2 years ago a locally famous multi-millionaire who lived in our county decided to shoot his wife, who had ALZ, and then himself. He was suffering from caregiver burnout and depression, and probably cognitive decline himself. So, don't underestimate that man and don't rely on his wife to cover for you. She's barely holding it together herself.
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KNance72 Apr 8, 2024
tragic
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I’m sorry you went through that. Please call 911 without hesitation if he returns. I hope his wife will also guard her own safety and call 911 anytime she feels in fear for her wellbeing. This can potentially get him the help he needs and will at least help establish a pattern of behavior highlighting his need for help. So scary…
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Anyone can become mentally ill at any time.
This recently has happened to a good friend of my partner's wife.
And no, it isn't dementia, and yes, it is mental illness. And the mania is PROFOUND.

You need to monitor calls, don't respond in any way EVER to him. That will stop his being drawn to you. Also do not answer the door. As someone in the thoes of mania he needs to be handled by authorities. You should call the police if the knocking continues and tell him you are doing so through the door.

This is a mess for the wife. Stay out of this entirely to the extent that you can. He may require institutional care at this level.
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Dawn88 Apr 8, 2024
Alva,
This is what I feared...a brilliant mind suddenly gone. My "Go To" person for 40+ years is now gone. I don't see a happy ending here. I have decided to stay away. My last good memory is a few months ago, when a mutual friend died at Cal Vet Yountville, and we both gave beautiful eulogies.
PROFOUND is putting it mildly. This sucks.
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Please tell your friend that when she calls 911, she should tell the dispatcher that her husband has recently begun acting this way, and that a mental illness of some kind is suspected.

This will help the officers to respond appropriately.
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Dawn, just a question concerning you. I skimmed back over the postsbin your following and did not see an individual post from you concerning your ex. Were you able to get him out of your home and get him help?
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Dawn88 Apr 8, 2024
Been fighting with Cal Vet over 2 years, with another meeting this week. Getting close to placement!
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I appreciate the excellent advice given. I knew I could count on this forum!
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My DIL is bipolar and your description is similar of the manic episode. It can be called the black out period. He is at an increased risk Io death during these episodes. Next time call 911 but explain it as a mental health issue so police do not kill him.
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