I was visiting my aunt yesterday and my mother called her. My aunt had her on speakerphone and my mother immediately started talking bad about my daughter and then moved on to me. Clearly, the gossip was none of my mother's business or my aunt’s. It was so hurtful and my aunt finally turned off the speaker. I am so hurt after all I’ve done for my mother. She’s just evil. The people at her church think she’s wonderful - she’s also a great actress. I confronted her and she said she didn’t say anything wrong. In other words, she won’t apologize. I just don’t know how much more I can take.
You don't say if mom has dementia. People with dementia lose their filters. Also, did mom know you were there and listening?
Do you have siblings?
How did you come to be her caregiver?
It helps to have more background information.
Here's an informative article from this agingcare.com website:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/stages-of-alzheimers-disease-118964.htm
Please keep an open mind and educate yourself so you are not blindsided by your mother's issues that may be out of her control. You need to look at her with "Caregiver Eyes" now.
Please give us a little more context and you will get better advice.
I think perhaps you need to say to your mother (if she's competent) "mom, what you did was very hurtful to me. In consequence of your unkind words, I need to take some time to re-think how much I'm doing for you."
Don't engage in an argument about this. Just back off for a few weeks and let her make her own arrangements for whatever help she needs.