How to get payed for taking care of parent, I am about to lose everything. But she is my mother. I LOVE HER . No nursing home. I moved in with her but still have expenses. Work maybe 15-20 hours a week. I heard there is a way to get paid for taking care of a parent. Mom gets SS, Medicare and has insurance. Please help. I am going to lose everything. Car possessions. PLEASE HELP
I’m very sorry to tell you that getting paid for caregiving for a loved one just doesn’t happen in most states. The only way would be for Mom to pay you out of what she get from Social Security. And, since you also need her money to pay for her own care, that can be like robbing Peter to pay Paul. If it’s life insurance, you can’t collect that until she passes, and if you cash it in, you will get far less than it’s worth. Plus, when she passes, you’ll be on the hook for burial expenses.
Tomorrow, get on the phone. Look up your local Jobs and Family Services office. These offices also house the agencies who can help you get money for food (food stamps) and can tell you if you qualify for any other help. There’s also the local area Agency on Aging you can call. Ask her doctor how you go about getting home health care help so you can pick up more hours at work and make more money. When you pay your bills, show good faith by sending your creditors something, anything. Write them letters and tell them you want to pay their bills and are trying to figure out a way. I’ve been doing that for months.
Don’t panic. Turn that energy into being proactive. Accept all help and don’t turn down any ideas. Think of what’s best for Mom. Don’t completely shut down the idea of a nursing home. She might be better off there than having you, an anxious mess, trying to take care of her and trying not to lose everything.
Just curious who told you that you can be paid? And who would be paying you?
You can check your State Medicaid [which is different from Medicare] to see if your Mom qualifies to be on Medicaid. Depending on your State, some States do have a payment program, but not the pay would be very minimal.
Curious why no skilled nursing home? Medicaid would pay for Mom's room, board and care. Then you would be able to go back to work instead of losing all of your life savings, plus your car, and health insurance if your work had that as a benefit.
If 20 years ago, do you think your Mom would approve of you quitting work and losing all of the funds and benefits? I bet she wouldn't.
I realize this is a tough situation. But you need to do what is best for your Mom AND what is best for you. Having very little money is just added stress with all the stress you have now with caregiving. That is why almost 40% of caregivers pass away leaving behind the love one they were caring.... not good odds... then what would your Mom do?
The vast majority of family caregivers do not get paid for the provision of care.
However, a loved one may use out-of-pocket retirement savings for this purpose. If a family member has enough funds to privately pay from savings, it is important to formally complete a Personal Care Agreement. Prior to receiving any payment, this document should be prepared to outline the services provided as well as the payment to be received. A personal care agreement can not be created retroactively to pay for past care.
The Caregiver Forum is a great place to come for answers. Additionally, I'd like to offer the following AgingCare articles as reference points:
To understand the purpose of and create a formal agreement between family members, please refer to:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/personal-care-agreements-compensate-family-caregivers-181562.htm
It is important to note that most outside sources of pay will only pay for medically based home health care provided by an authorized agency. For a general overview regarding paying for care, please refer to:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/paying-for-home-care-155405.htm
And finally, if you would like further information regarding the decision to hire a home care company that fits your needs and your budget, please refer to:
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-select-a-home-care-company-230598.htm
If you are new to caregiving you will likely have future questions. There are many answers from experienced caregivers here. Don't hesitate to come back and ask.
You're only hope is finding a work from home job or work part time so she's not alone more that 3 hrs at a time. (which is what I'm doing)
I don't know the amount of care that is required by your Mom, but I take care of my 99 yr old grandmother who, between the two of us (I'm on disablity), we make too much to qualify for Medicaid, even with the spend-down (for a household of 2 in MS, I think the total salary is $28K or something, which rules us out because she gets her SSI and a pension, and I get my disability income - which, although not a lot, together, it's more than Medicaid allows), so I found a job that I can work from home on the computer - I'm an outbound cold-caller, but there are other types of jobs that you can find that you can do from home. It takes a while to hunt them down, but they are out there...you can work your own hours, and fit the hours in when it's convenient for you (when you're not doing caretaking duties or going to doctor's appointments), and still feel like you're contributing to your own well-being. It's made a world of difference for me - not just in the money, but in giving me something else to do and look forward to every day - not just CARETAKING, and I have some extra spending money that I didn't have b4 that I use when I get to get away (which isn't as often as I would like, but I'm an AVID AMAZON SHOPPER :} ), and because I have a RESPONSIBILITY to my job, I think it does something for my mental state - it gives me some sort of pride or something that I can say 'I'm not just a caretaker,' which, don't get me wrong, not everyone can do this job, so give yourself a huge hug and a biggole pat on the back...but I guess what I'm trying to say is I am doing something else, something for ME, and not just for HER...if that makes any sense?? Hope that helps...
PS...all you have to do to find a good at home job is look on indeed or other online job posting sites, and put in 'work-at-home' I put in CUSTOMER SERVICE or SALES or something like that, just make sure you don't get sucked in to those insurance scam places that want you to sell insurance to all of your family and friends...that's not work-at-home...that's multi-level-marketing...NOT the same thing. So just check out the posting before you answer the ad. You'll soon figure out which ones are the type to answer and which ones aren't. Also, there are some companies that you can work for that you pay to take a training class for companies like Disney, Carnival Cruise lines, etc., and they pay like $10 - $14 an hour, and you just pay the company you go through a small percentage for running your payroll through their 'company'...different business model, but still legit. Just do some research, and you'll see what I mean. It'll make the difference for you, I P.R.O.M.I.S.E.