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My mom has become impossible for my dad to handle almost overnight. We need help now. Do I call an ambulance?

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If she becomes violent yes you call 911. Tell the dispatcher that mom is becoming violent and will probably hurt someone or herself. Explain that she has dementia and the you can not control her.
Once the paramedics arrive you ask for her to be transported to the hospital.
Once there you can explain the situation, ask to talk to a Social Worker. Explain that mom has become more violent and it is no longer safe for her to remain at home. They should be able to help with placement after she has calmed down and the proper medication has been found to calm the anxiety.
You will also have to convince dad that he can not handle the violence that can come with dementia. This is important because once she has been put on anti anxiety medication he may think he can care for her again.
When I was caring for my Husband the 1 rule I had was safety.
As long as it was safe for him for me to care for him.....
As long as it was safe for me to care for him.....
I would keep him at home.
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When you get to the ER, ask that she be checked for a UTI.   If this behavior has such a rapid onset, that's a possibility.
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