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We see a lot of questions on cost around here, and I figured it would be useful to just share our and our family’s direct personal experiences on this issue with concrete examples in hopes that others will do the same and help us solidify our overall understanding.


My dh works at a ccrc high rise that doesn’t provide memory or nursing care. During his interviews, he was encouraged to view the residents (or the “members” as they call them, as if they were on a cruise ship. Which is that the members or their families are expected to provide aides for ADLs, cognitive decline, etc. They only have 20 beds for al, whose residents not only must keep paying their bill but now must pay double to move to one room in which there’s an actual al staff to check up on you every couple of hours.


The latest to join the membership club paid 600k for a 2bd condo that now carries a $9,500 monthly “hoa” that gets them weekly housekeeping, access to the very nice library and pool. They have in house restaurants comparable to four star restaurants where a filet mignon is 25 bucks vs 45 and where you don’t have to tip. However, it’s not free food. If they’re relying on it, that’s another $1,500.

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If one had to privately pay qualified aids for in-home 24/7 care it would exceed the cost of most facilities.
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TakeFoxAway Jun 13, 2024
Really? I thought a nurse at home 24/7 would be cheaper than a facility. I'm surprised.
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You cannot determine the cost of care on a forum like this . It depends on the a state you live in. And even within a state the price varies. I live in S New Jersey. Anyone from the area will tell you North and South are two different cultures especially the Counties near NYC. The South would be cheaper than the north. You just have to do the research where u live.
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Lovemom1941 Jun 30, 2024
You can get a good idea of what to expect though.
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Your husband works for an AL that only the rich can afford.
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PeggySue2020 Jun 8, 2024
Oh, he certainly does realize that. We joke about it all the time.
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About $9000/month and up as more care is needed.
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That sounds insane! My cousins bought into a CCRC here in Denver that does have all levels of care services available, IL, AL, MC and SNF. They paid a buy in of $500k which insures them care services until death, in whatever care level they require, even if they run out of money to pay the monthly rent associated with each care level. They have a brand new 1500sf apartment in IL right now which they got to pick out the finishes for, 2 bedroom, and last I knew, were paying $3500 a month. They buy meal coupons for the various restaurants on the huge property as well, although I'm not sure the cost. I want to say $1500 for 15 meals apiece that can also be delivered to their apt. Nothing is inexpensive about CCRC living, but they can easily afford it and won't likely run out of money, either. They have no children to help them out in any way, so CCRC was a good option. They're mid 70s.

Mom and dad paid $6500 a month 10 years ago in AL for both of them in a 1 bedroom, with dad needing highest level care.

Mom paid $6700 a month for a suite in Memory Care Assisted Living in 2022 which was a smallish room and bathroom. All services were included but incontinence supplies were extra. Meds, doctor bills, phone and personal items were extra too. Again, in the greater Denver metro area.

Super expensive no matter what.
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PeggySue2020 Jun 9, 2024
Is The buy-in fee refunded at death or departure from the ccrc? Is the amount refunded based on the amount of care they have received? It almost seems like it’d have to be to subsidize the signicantly higher cost of al and mc, and especially snf.
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There are so many variables to the cost for any one individual that it’s too difficult to give any kind of estimate. My mother was in three different facilities in two states. The last one, in California, was by far the nicest, most modern facility and the most expensive. Base rent for AL without medication management was $6400 a month. By the end of her life just a month ago we were at $9100 because she needed help with everything other than feeding herself. Her dementia had dramatically increased as her mobility decreased. So it really depends on the level of care required for each resident.
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In the Detroit area, we are paying $33/hr for in home care for both of my parents thru an agency. Mom has dementia which makes finding home care help difficult. Dad has mobility issues Right now we have 10 hrs/day of help but the amount of help required will increase over time.
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WOW. 

I guess they don’t see a lot of Medi-Cal residents in there, do they.

California: $6500/mo board & care with private room, never more than six residents at a time. Everything provided: Adjustable bed, comforters, dresser, nightstands, recliner, lamps, all toiletries needed for bathing. 

(Walking in and seeing my mom's hair styled, wearing a crown, surrounded by balloons, flowers, and gifts from "her girls" on her birthday: Priceless)

Beautiful newer home, very modern, open kitchen to great room, high ceilings with lots of natural lighting, three full baths with walk in showers, one being a roll in, nice decor, wood plantation shudders, backyard with outside patio and string lighting, and always extremely clean. State reports and unannounced inspections pass with flying colors. Three home cooked meals per day plus snacks and all laundry services included. Manicures and polish every Sunday as needed or desired. Owned locally and owner is always in there making sure things are running smoothly. Two aides and a supervisor (divides her time between two homes) during the day. One med tech always on duty. Staff frequently texts with photos and videos and have answered the phone within three rings 100% of the time day or evening.

Increase of 3% expected in January of each year and one-on-one is extra (it’s in the contract but not in front of me at the moment). The 1:1 is considered dedicated 24/7 with resident 100% of the time. 

Same company provides in home services at $38/hr base with 4/hr minimum. 
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PeggySue2020 Jun 13, 2024
Where in California is this?

California rates vary a lot. Dh’s ccrc is in Silicon Valley. Were it in the Central Valley, it’d be probably half that.
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Fla $4,800 AL includes everything.

I wouldn't buy a 600k place then add on the $9,500, crazy to me.
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SadBigSister Jun 14, 2024
That is what we are paying for my Dad's AL in FL. There was also a non-refundable entrance fee that was about what a month's
rent was. It includes all his meals, cleaning his room and transportation to MD appts. if needed although we take care of those now since we are here. There is also a bi-weekly shopping trip to Wal-Mart. He is still at care level 1 which includes medication management. If he needs more assistance with bathing and dressing and mobility then he goes up a level and so does his monthly fee. The residents are reassessed regularly. There are activities provided but he does not participate.
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My 97 year old mother lives with me. I don't use her income to pay for anything related to my home (utilities, taxes, maintenance) which is paid off.

I use her income to pay for a sitter (I have 3 private sitters who come on different days as needed). Maybe 16 hours each week at $20/hour = $320 per week on average.

I use her income to pay for her toiletries, depends, pads, her clothing as needed, a portion of the grocery bill, etc. All of that is maybe $400 / month.

So it costs roughly $1700 / month to care for my mother with most of that being sitters to give me a break.
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