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As a POA who lives 350 miles away, I am trying to get as many documents mailed to me and not my blind, demented mother who has random caregivers and service people wandering in and out.
Certain things have been easy enough, but Social Security, IRS, state programs I am concerned will open up a can of worms if I try to change the address through them. Has anybody just used a change of address to get mail forwarded to them? Are there any other good methods?
Mom refuses to move closer to me. I will have to get guardianship and force her if I want to make that happen and I’m just not quite there yet.

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I found this to be VERY problematic, living half the state away from my brother. I was POA and handling all finances and bills and after MUCH WORK and sending copies of documents to all entities I finally got to the point where, with signed document from my brother, Medicare and his insurance would send me copies of everything. But IRS and SS were impossible. I ended up flying back and forth more than a few times. I could work somewhat with the ALF but that was quite honestly problematic of itself with things falling through cracks. You can go to SS and become representative payee, but that will put you in a whole other kettle of fish as to presenting documents from the doctor attesting to incompetency or inability of parent to receive mail.
GOOD LUCK.
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shirenagel Oct 26, 2025
Thanks for your reply and validating my experience. Sometimes it just helps to know I’ve done all I can and these are the limits.
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I was Personal Representative for my deceased Aunt in FL and I live in MN. After she passed I was literally unable to get the state of Florida to consistently forward her mail. I have a trusted neighbor checks her box and texts me pics. This is since March 2025 and I've twice been the the PO in person in both states and they have twice assured me I've done everything correctly at my end. It's mostly late medical bills associated with my Aunt's hospitalization so I have no idea what mail is coming and from where.

Do everything digitally, paperless. Create online accounts in portals. There's very little reason to get actual snail mail anymore. Businesses are happy to not spend money on postage.
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shirenagel Oct 26, 2025
Indeed… I absolutely agree that paper mail is pointless. It is certainly a thorn in my side. I’ve managed to get almost everything online, but it just seems there’s a few stubborn agencies that can’t adapt. Sorry for your struggles as well as my own. One more thing making an already difficult job more difficult. 😣
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Both SS and IRS have online access.

I bought a mail box that required a key to access. I left Prestamped, self addressed envelopes for a trusted person with a mailbox key to mail important docs in. Made it as easy as possible for them to help out.

My DH picks up mail for a neighbor. Opens it and texts her photos of mail. She comes in every few months and picks up hardcopies. Works well. Not much mail and right next door.
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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The USPS has a service called "Informed Delivery" where each morning they send me an email of photos of the mail that will be delivered that day. It is a scanned photograph of the letters (or junk mail), along with any packages, that are expected.

The service is free.

Perhaps this might help in your situation?
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shirenagel Oct 26, 2025
Thank you…that is a great piece of info and very useful indeee. I do have that. It’s just enough to see the mail and be frustrated that it’s being sent there even though I’ve tried to have everything be digital/electronic. Some orgs and agencies just insist on sending paper mail.
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If you can create an online SS account for your mother, you can direct how she is paid benefits and have access online to important info for her. You can change her address, designate a bank to which benefits are paid, and access her past payments into the system. You can do this without speaking to a human.

To create online Social Security access for your mom, go to the My Social Security portal at ssa.gov/myaccount, select "Create an Account," and follow the prompts to register with either Login.gov or ID.me. You will need your mom's Social Security number, a valid email address, and a US mailing address to complete the process, which includes verifying her identity online or in person. 
1. Gather necessary information 
Your mom's Social Security number
A valid US mailing address
A valid email address (you will need to create one for her if she doesn't have one)
A government-issued photo ID, such as a driver's license or state ID, for identity verification 
2. Go to the Social Security website 
Navigate to the My Social Security portal at ssa.gov/myaccount.
Click the "Create an Account" button. 
3. Choose a credential service 
You will be given the option to create an account with either Login.gov or ID.me.
Select one of the options and click "Create an Account" on the next page to be redirected to their site. 
4. Create login credentials 
Login.gov: Enter an email address, create a strong password (at least 12 characters, including uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers, and special characters), and set up multi-factor authentication (MFA).
ID.me: Enter a personal email address, create a strong password (at least eight characters, with one uppercase letter, one lowercase letter, and one number), and set up multi-factor authentication (MFA). 
5. Verify your mom's identity 
You will be redirected to a page to verify her identity.
You will need to provide personal information and may need to take photos of a government-issued ID and a selfie.
The information provided must match what the Social Security Administration has on file.
Ensure the name and address are entered exactly as they appear on official documents, such as her Social Security card and driver's license. 
6. Complete the process
After verifying her identity, you will be redirected back to the Social Security website.
Review and agree to the terms of service to gain access to her account. 
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shirenagel Oct 26, 2025
Thank you for the detailed response. I should have mentioned that every possible thing I can do online is done. There just seem to be some things that agencies insist on doing by mail. I don’t think I’ve run into problems yet with the SS stuff but just in case would like to be due paper mail comes to me.
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You address should have a second line for c/o you then your address. I was guardian for my mom across state lines. I had no difficulty except for one of her assets 1099 which I could correct at tax time.
For SS, I assume her checks are direct deposit. Her annual correspondence can be set up bu mail or on line
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Reply to MACinCT
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I'm having problems as well. We sold mom's home last year and I just went and asked the post office to forward her mail to me once again. I have no idea what documents are not getting through to me. Mom cannot remember all of her investments (some she sold) either. Found out a bank I put on online statements only didn't have my address down correctly, but still had her old one listed. Thankfully I finally caught it recently and changed it. Mom probably had online accounts with some places, maybe including government agencies, but we didn't find any helpful passwords when we cleaned her house. I only have financial POA, not guardianship. I've had this on my to do list for going on two years, but I still haven't figured out exactly how to tackle the SS issue, especially since she may already have an online account and I don't have the password. I think Medicare and Medicaid finally updated automatically after I asked the post office to change her address to mine.
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