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Are they experiencing any memory loss?
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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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She is a very good gardener and a good & nice person. He has accused her of stealing keys, shears and the latest is a hammer. Told my neighbour that he might hit me over the head with it.
If your husband is talking about hurting you, I would remove all tools or weapons from his control. Is there a medical reason for this? Does he have dementia? You might discuss it with his doctor.
If it's dementia, my experience has been that it sometimes works if I suggest that the disliked person has positive things to say about the person with dementia. I may say, Oh, they had nice things to say about you or they mentioned that you were a nice lady or a good singer. I try to put them in a good light with lots of positive things. Sometimes it makes a difference and sometimes it doesn't. I have found that if it's dementia, sometimes the dislike will go away on it's on with the patient having no memory that they every had the dislike.
Hi - at some level, I'd let let her know he's feeling animosity and it's completely unreasonable you know, but let her be aware to keep her distance. My mother says stuff like that to others, too, assassinating politicians etc. :0 so hopefully this neighbor understands the overall psychology. Good idea about trying to paint her rosy to him. If she has access to the house (sounds like it) see if you can't reduce that access. He's evidently got a lot of time on his hands, and people will use their imaginations when bored. Surely it would be great to get him into some hobby or pursuit if you can. Good luck.
I agree with the suggestion of putting the maligned person in a "good light". I caretake my aunt & uncle who have Alzheimer's and dementia. The aunt says bad things about me all the time. It also helps that the people who get told these things do not believe them or even pretend to the person saying them that they believe it. The mind is a fertile ground for those suffering with the disease. They tend to dwell on the negative and certainly do not need any encouragement of negativity.
First, keep your eyes and ears open in case there may be some basis for his negative reaction to the gardener. Second, have him checked out by his doctor, possibly evaluated for medication. Blessings for a positive outcome.
Fannyann, just thinking outside of the box here.... wonder if your hubby resents that someone else is now doing the yard work which he use to do on a regular basis. Maybe he's angry at himself.
If it is possible, have your gardener ask your hubby what he thinks about this or that in respect to the landscaping.
At one time I use to do all my own landscaping, then eventually got someone to mow.... in fact, at this very moment I have landscapers cleaning up my backyard which had fallen into disrepair, a crazy natural habitat gone wild, and what a great job they are doing... I go out and chat a few minutes with the guys asking what do they think, suggestions, ideas, etc. How I wish I could be doing the work, but that ship sailed 6 years ago when I became my parent's driver, I don't have the free time nor the energy :(
Get your husband to a neurologist to have him checked for dementia, his bloodwork and a checkup. These are all symptoms of someone having a difficult time making brain connections and making accurate decisions. Do it before he does hit you with a hammer.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If it's dementia, my experience has been that it sometimes works if I suggest that the disliked person has positive things to say about the person with dementia. I may say, Oh, they had nice things to say about you or they mentioned that you were a nice lady or a good singer. I try to put them in a good light with lots of positive things. Sometimes it makes a difference and sometimes it doesn't. I have found that if it's dementia, sometimes the dislike will go away on it's on with the patient having no memory that they every had the dislike.
If it is possible, have your gardener ask your hubby what he thinks about this or that in respect to the landscaping.
At one time I use to do all my own landscaping, then eventually got someone to mow.... in fact, at this very moment I have landscapers cleaning up my backyard which had fallen into disrepair, a crazy natural habitat gone wild, and what a great job they are doing... I go out and chat a few minutes with the guys asking what do they think, suggestions, ideas, etc. How I wish I could be doing the work, but that ship sailed 6 years ago when I became my parent's driver, I don't have the free time nor the energy :(