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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I'm sorry that your family is so dysfunctional and that you were the victim of their abuse, including your mother.
My best advice to you is to seek help from a therapist so that you can find and keep healthy boundaries. You are an adult, and any abuse that you feel you are now subject to is because you are allowing it. Read about FOG (fear, obligation and guilt).
In your profile you also mentioned worry over the others getting all her money and assets, etc. This fear is driving poor decisions by you. I sincerely wish you wisdom, clarity and peace in your heart as you come to terms with the fact that you are under no obligation to help your former abuser.
I did read your profile. While I can offer you sympathy here I think that you need a good professional counselor. I am one here who refers severe medical issues to the MDs of he world, critical legal and financial advice needs to CPAs, attorneys and financial advisors.
We are just a bunch of caregivers. While we may have some overlap in professional history (I am a retired RN) we do not know you, do not know your family and are not in a position to advise you on family dynamics that are this much in need of professional help.
Please consider seeing a good counselor. By good I always mean a licensed and certified Social Worker in private counseling practice for a psychologist with good credentials. You need someone who won't simply listen to the year by year stories over and over, but one who will help you identify goals for your own life and help you negotiate new paths to reach them. People become stuck in the mud of habitual ways of responding.
Please seek help for yourself. You are desperately in need of it. My heart goes out to you and I wish you the best.
I found your post confusing. Have your resided in the US your whole life? I can't understand if you took your parents in or your siblings have been doing the caring.
I get there is some empathy here for Mom even though she abused you. From your profile Mom is not a well woman, the reason the need for care. At this point, I would not worry about Mom. I would worry about getting that apt and having/getting that job. You need to worry about you.
When it comes to an inheritance, let them have it. If Mom leaves a Will I so hope ur a beneficiary. If not, the State determines who inherits and you being a child will inherit.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My best advice to you is to seek help from a therapist so that you can find and keep healthy boundaries. You are an adult, and any abuse that you feel you are now subject to is because you are allowing it. Read about FOG (fear, obligation and guilt).
In your profile you also mentioned worry over the others getting all her money and assets, etc. This fear is driving poor decisions by you. I sincerely wish you wisdom, clarity and peace in your heart as you come to terms with the fact that you are under no obligation to help your former abuser.
Do you have NAMI in your area? Please seek out a therapist to help you to heal. You deserve to live in peace.
Not only that, you are in recovery. Please don’t place unnecessary pressure on yourself by caregiving and place your sobriety in jeopardy.
I did read your profile. While I can offer you sympathy here I think that you need a good professional counselor. I am one here who refers severe medical issues to the MDs of he world, critical legal and financial advice needs to CPAs, attorneys and financial advisors.
We are just a bunch of caregivers. While we may have some overlap in professional history (I am a retired RN) we do not know you, do not know your family and are not in a position to advise you on family dynamics that are this much in need of professional help.
Please consider seeing a good counselor. By good I always mean a licensed and certified Social Worker in private counseling practice for a psychologist with good credentials. You need someone who won't simply listen to the year by year stories over and over, but one who will help you identify goals for your own life and help you negotiate new paths to reach them. People become stuck in the mud of habitual ways of responding.
Please seek help for yourself. You are desperately in need of it. My heart goes out to you and I wish you the best.
I get there is some empathy here for Mom even though she abused you. From your profile Mom is not a well woman, the reason the need for care. At this point, I would not worry about Mom. I would worry about getting that apt and having/getting that job. You need to worry about you.
When it comes to an inheritance, let them have it. If Mom leaves a Will I so hope ur a beneficiary. If not, the State determines who inherits and you being a child will inherit.