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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
I just read your profile, and it seems that you and your wife must be doing a lot for your mother. She has many medical conditions!
I was in a somewhat similar situation, and ended up being paid by one of my brothers, who along with another brother were the POAs (3 brothers, all out of state).
I'd brought up the topic of compensation to my mother one time, and she was indignant that "you don't pay family!" I won't go into the difficulties between my mother and me, bur suffice it to say that I very much resented that I had to spend hours and hours each week, and I wasn't appreciated at all. To the contrary, I was told my time wasn't worth anything, that I didn't know anything, etc., as my mother descended further into dementia.
When she was finally hospitalized, then into rehab, then into a nursing home (she'd been living "independently" in a condo 7 minutes from me), my POA brother agreed to pay me and even offered to do back-pay for the previous 2 years when my mother started becoming difficult.
No caregiver agreement, and no taxes taken out. My mother would have never qualified for Medicaid.
If you are visiting to provide care, IMHO, you should enter into a personal care agreement with her and get paid (or you can let amounts accumulate till her death, but medical expenses may eat them up). If you are visiting to say hello, no
Oh, dear. I hope you don't speak to your mother about this. I will tell you this. My beloved Dad, the kindest and gentlest man I ever knew, a man who, like me, wasn't really "a believer", loved that old Joe McCrea movie where Joel was a traveling preacher. I can't remember the name, but they played the old Hymn "Will There Be Any Stars in my Crown". My Dad taught me to try to do good, to try to leave everyone the better for my being there, to try to leave even PLACES better, cleaner, stronger for my visit. And when he would do some small good thing, like holding his hand on a car next to his so his car door didn't ding the finish on the other car he would giggle and say "Another Star in my Crown". He lived to his 90s and I am in my late 70s and think of him still. Look at the firmament and think of all the stars he must be lugging about. So when you lovingly visit your Mom, when you treasure her and celebrate your love, just think about that hymn. I bet you can find it on YouTube or something. I may go look.
Is that why you're visiting? You're in it for the money?
I imagine you will resent the very idea. This demonstrates that your individual relationship with your mother and the distribution of her estate are entirely unrelated subjects.
You will be entitled to what your mother has specified in her will. So will your brother.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I was in a somewhat similar situation, and ended up being paid by one of my brothers, who along with another brother were the POAs (3 brothers, all out of state).
I'd brought up the topic of compensation to my mother one time, and she was indignant that "you don't pay family!" I won't go into the difficulties between my mother and me, bur suffice it to say that I very much resented that I had to spend hours and hours each week, and I wasn't appreciated at all. To the contrary, I was told my time wasn't worth anything, that I didn't know anything, etc., as my mother descended further into dementia.
When she was finally hospitalized, then into rehab, then into a nursing home (she'd been living "independently" in a condo 7 minutes from me), my POA brother agreed to pay me and even offered to do back-pay for the previous 2 years when my mother started becoming difficult.
No caregiver agreement, and no taxes taken out. My mother would have never qualified for Medicaid.
I will tell you this. My beloved Dad, the kindest and gentlest man I ever knew, a man who, like me, wasn't really "a believer", loved that old Joe McCrea movie where Joel was a traveling preacher. I can't remember the name, but they played the old Hymn "Will There Be Any Stars in my Crown".
My Dad taught me to try to do good, to try to leave everyone the better for my being there, to try to leave even PLACES better, cleaner, stronger for my visit. And when he would do some small good thing, like holding his hand on a car next to his so his car door didn't ding the finish on the other car he would giggle and say "Another Star in my Crown". He lived to his 90s and I am in my late 70s and think of him still. Look at the firmament and think of all the stars he must be lugging about.
So when you lovingly visit your Mom, when you treasure her and celebrate your love, just think about that hymn. I bet you can find it on YouTube or something. I may go look.
I imagine you will resent the very idea. This demonstrates that your individual relationship with your mother and the distribution of her estate are entirely unrelated subjects.
You will be entitled to what your mother has specified in her will. So will your brother.