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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I have this issue as well to the point where I almost test the waters with mum first thing in the morning to see if plans for the day are feasible thus I NEVER tell her about appointments or plans until 10 mins before!
Just to help us have more context about your situation: does you husband have a medical diagnosis of dementia/memory impairment? And if yes, do you know what kind he has? This is important because some dementias may be treated differently than others, different meds, different trajectories of disease progression, etc.
If he doesn't have a diagnosis, it would be important to get one, and also to discount other medical conditions that can produce dementia-like symptoms: brain tumor, head trauma, thyroid, kidney, liver, heart and lung problems, UTIs, chest infections, strokes.
If he has a diagnosis, there are many resources online:
Teepa Snow videos on YouTube (she is an expert that gives great explanations about what dementia is, how it creates the changes in our LOs and how to better engage with them as their disease progresses).
...and this forum's most important care topic of Burnout.
I'm hoping he has all his legal ducks in a row: has assigned you or one of his daughters as DPoA, has created an Advance Healthcare Directive (Living Will), etc. If none of this is in place, I strongly recommend this be done before his cognition worsens.
You should also educate yourself about Medicaid since so many financially responsible people live long enough to still need it at some point in their elder years. Even if you think you will never need it, never say never about it. It is important to preserve his ability to qualify *just in case* his health or caregiving needs take a turn into such territory as to require it. In many states the application's financial "look back" period can be 5 years, which causes many people to manage their LOs financial affairs in a way that delays or disqualifies them. I can't stress this enough: please educate yourself by investing in a professional Medicaid Planner for your state. You won't regret it.
I wish you much wisdom and peace in your heart as you provide hands-on, daily care for your husband.
I don't think dementia is a straight line of decline. It is more like a roller coaster. Good times and bad times. You just never know what you're going to get. Though both extremes progressively get worse.
Yes, it's totally normal for people with dementia to have perfectly normal, lucid days and then other days where they're totally off the rails. For us, that's one of the worst aspects of the condition: the not knowing WHAT we're going to find in terms of behavior from one day to the next; sometimes from one hour to the next. Regardless of 'what type' of dementia your loved one has, changing behavior goes along with the territory.
The 36 Hour Day is a good reference book to refer to on a wide variety of topics; very handy in general.
Best of luck with a hideous situation. My mother has advanced dementia and I HATE it with every ounce of my being.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If he doesn't have a diagnosis, it would be important to get one, and also to discount other medical conditions that can produce dementia-like symptoms: brain tumor, head trauma, thyroid, kidney, liver, heart and lung problems, UTIs, chest infections, strokes.
If he has a diagnosis, there are many resources online:
Teepa Snow videos on YouTube (she is an expert that gives great explanations about what dementia is, how it creates the changes in our LOs and how to better engage with them as their disease progresses).
https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/dementia-vs-alzheimers/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIz6e9p-6I9AIVWODICh2PrgCUEAAYBCAAEgJx6_D_BwE
...and this forum's most important care topic of Burnout.
I'm hoping he has all his legal ducks in a row: has assigned you or one of his daughters as DPoA, has created an Advance Healthcare Directive (Living Will), etc. If none of this is in place, I strongly recommend this be done before his cognition worsens.
You should also educate yourself about Medicaid since so many financially responsible people live long enough to still need it at some point in their elder years. Even if you think you will never need it, never say never about it. It is important to preserve his ability to qualify *just in case* his health or caregiving needs take a turn into such territory as to require it. In many states the application's financial "look back" period can be 5 years, which causes many people to manage their LOs financial affairs in a way that delays or disqualifies them. I can't stress this enough: please educate yourself by investing in a professional Medicaid Planner for your state. You won't regret it.
I wish you much wisdom and peace in your heart as you provide hands-on, daily care for your husband.
The 36 Hour Day is a good reference book to refer to on a wide variety of topics; very handy in general.
Best of luck with a hideous situation. My mother has advanced dementia and I HATE it with every ounce of my being.