Mom's in a retirement home with nursing staff (I believe most you know it is assisted living?). She has, I'd say, "moderate" Alzheimer's. She is pretty socially active there: plays all of the card games, goes out on excursions, etc. She's not what I would call "with it" when she plays these games, but she participates nonetheless.
I see her a couple of times a week, and take her out. The end goal is usually to have something to eat at my place, or at a restaurant. Sometimes a little drive is involved.
Is there anything else I could be doing with her to keep her busy? Something that DOESN'T involve a great deal of TALKING? (Words are failing her big time now, and she is forgetting some shared memories, and she has no curiosity about anything that's happening around her/in our lives. It's a lesson in frustration.)
We used to play a lot of Scrabble, but that's turned into a nightmare.
She used to play a lot of solitaire on our computer, but now insists that she's never seen it played where you put the Aces up top, and deal out three cards at a time, and play red/then black/then red, etc.
She used to fold laundry and help chop up vegetables, but even that is too much for her now.
Is there anything else I could be doing with her to spice up our time together?
In her world - life is all about her physically. Mostly, she says "It's cold." or "What's it doing out there?" - meaning the weather - or "I want a cookie". Nothing holds her interest these days. She stares at pencil, or spoon or book - like she's looking at aliens. When she is cold, I've tried to gently blow warm air from a hair dryer under her covers. She screams and says it's too hot. (Believe me, I am very, very careful to only blow the air for a couple seconds, not close to her skin etc. I did it for my husband when he was sick and he loved it).
I feel guilty but by day's end I need a bit of down time for myself and am too exhausted to entertain her. :(
Marialake: I'm so sorry for your predicament. (There's always someone who has it worse than I. At least my mom's somewhere else.) The stage your mother-in-law is at is what I have to look forward to. *sigh* And it's your mother-IN-LAW, too! I've only been on these boards for a couple of days, so I'm not familiar with your story. (Are there no other children of her own to help out? And -- save for a small minority of men -- why is it that the women in families tend to get "saddled" with looking after everyone? But these are questions for another thread, perhaps?)
Thanks, dear ladies. We might not have all the answers, but at least we have a place to unload!
I'm honoured to be among a group of wonderful people who are so willing to lend an ear.