I think for myself, I hope sincerely to die before ever needing such care, but if I do, I would just assume it was in an assisted living setting and not tied to family. I hope I would be safe, clean, not a pain in the butt and not one of those unfortunates that are doomed to linger for years in that state of dependency, incontinence, loss and weariness.
When I get too old to live in this house by myself, I don't want anyone taking me in theirs or selling theirs to come move in with me or leaving their jobs much less put their own marriages at risk. See if you can use my reasources to help me stay in this house. I'm finally reaching the point of knowing who I really am after being forced into a mold 50 some years ago.
Now and particularly after my mother dies, I want the freedom to fly and live my life as totally me for whatever years that I have before me. There are things worse than death and I've seen both.
If my wife would agree, I'd extend our privacy fence around the rest of our backyard for my neighbors back yards take away from the beauty of the landscaping her, but moreso because I felt that my family and I lived in a glass house for 20 years and now I'd like some radical privacy which for right now I enjoy soley in my "Man Cave"