has had an accident, but unlike last time, he wasn’t ticketed. He’s 92 and has dementia. We decided to tell him to hand over the keys. He honestly didn’t think this was any big deal! Lol..Anyway, he’s still manageable and doesn’t need nursing home care. Should we pay full market value for the truck? My concern is that he’ll try to take that money and buy something else. He’s been trying to bargain with me about driving again and I told him no way. What concerns me is that although we live in his house, we pay for a majority of the expenses, including my handling of all of his day to day needs. He would not be able to afford to live in the house and afford upkeep, nor could he keep up with the chores. Is it as simple as us still having to pay full market value and hope that he doesn’t try to buy something else? No one in the family has ever stayed in a nursing home longer than a year. He doesn’t have a lot of cash and his house is his biggest asset. It’s a pretty complex situation, because he can’t gift the house to us, either. I’m just not sure how anything should be taken care of because of his age/ risk. Thanks for your time.
His PoA can legally prevent him from driving and manage his finances so that he doesn't do irrational and wreckless things. Do not allow anecdotal fears about facilities prevent your family from considering this a possible solution if necessary. My MIL lived in AL then LTC on Medicaid for 7 years in an excellent facility that had gardens, was on a large suburban recreational lake, had a boat in which they took residents out (even ones in wheel chairs) and an Activities Director. She had a much richer daily life than I could ever have given her. Because a facility should never be discounted as a option, you should consult with a certified elder law or estate attorney or Medicaid Planner for your home state to make sure you don't do anything that will disqualify your Father. In most states the financial application lookback is 5 years. Your Dad is already 92.
Yes, you should buy the vehicle for FMV and make sure to have a paper trail. Suggest he put the money in a short-term investment so he can't access it easily (like a 6-month CD or something). Time to consult with a professional so that you won't be blindsided by his future care and management needs.
If you have POA its time to use it. Talk to the bank and see how you can stop Dad from getting to his money. Your roles are now reversed. Dad is the child and your are the parent. Its no longer what he wants, its what he needs. You can tell him No Dad. Even if Dementia was not in the picture, 2 accidents at 92 is serious. With Dementia, his licence should have been taken away when he was diagnosed.