My father passed away last year at the age of 82 and our family home was left to me and my 2 siblings in a trust. I am the trustee. His trust states his wife (79) can live there as long she wishes. They had been married 5 years when my father passed. She had a severe stroke the 2nd year of their marriage and my father was her sole caregiver. She now lives alone which does not seem safe based on her cognitive decline and mobility issues. Her children have tried to talk to her about getting medical help or moving in with them or even into a smaller place of her own, but she refuses. Now she refuses to speak with them, and won't answer the phone or the door. She tells me that she often sees people in the house, her things are being stolen, and claims to see a man shining a flashlight into her bedroom window each night. She is losing weight and the home smells from urine and garbage. I must admit that I selfishly want her to move out so that we can sell our family home and get out from under the stressful (and financially burdensome) situation but we also care about her well being. Since she won't listen to her kid's pleas to move or get help, what can we legally do to move her to assisted living and/or ensure she gets the medical care she needs?
If no one is her PoA and you are leasing the home to her, you don't have to renew the lease, or you can go through a legal eviction process. But where she moves *to* is another matter. She doesn't need to like it or be cooperative. She sounds like she is in bad need of help and her own kids need to step up, if they're interested. Whatever you do, do not do anything without first looping in her kids first. You can inform the kids that the home IS going up for sale and that they need to work on helping get their mother placed (and give a deadline), either in their home or a facility. She's not really your problem since they were only married for 5 years and she has her own adult children. I wish you much wisdom and peace in your heart in working through this challenge.
There is a whole lot to be concerned about. What is the upkeep? Are there leaks, things broken, mold setting in.
I don't know if this is a Trust, but there should be contact with Trustee if so. I would get a Trust and Estate Attorney. You have an interest in the care, upkeep, taxes and etc being paid on this property no matter what her condition is.
Next, make a wellness check report to APS with your concerns.
You are not her POA or her guardian. You have no rights to move her at all. The relatives will be contacted by APS. If they don't wish anything to do with this she may become ward of the state. Let her relations know this, because if this happens they will have nothing to say about where she is placed or about anything else regarding finances and etc.
Wishing you good luck. Hope you will update us.
As far as her placement, that is likely something she needs. If her children don't step up tel them you are reporting to APS and she may fall under state guardianship if they don't wish to step up.
As you are Trustee you can see a good trust and estate attorney and you SHOULD. The trust pays for this.
I am not certain why it says that you are "leasing" it to her.
Good luck.
I don't know much about trusts but don't think it should have not been worded this way. What she wishes and what she needs is two different things. This is what you need to talk to a lawyer about. Of course she wants to stay there but she no longer can care for herself. It comes to a point its not what she wants, its what she needs.
You should not be paying out of pocket for anything concerning the house. If she can't afford to keep it up, she should not be living there. That should also have been written into the trust. This is a Life Estate thing and should have been written as such. Really, why should you be supporting her if she has children. She had health problems before why did your Dad think she could continue to live in the house with no care support.
Time to get together with her kids. Find out who is POA. Its their responsibility to have Mom found incompetent to make informed decisions. When they do that, then the POA can have her placed. Either her paying privately or POA applying for Medicaid and placing her. This is her children's responsibility. Tell them if not done in a reasonable time (Medicaid can take 3 months) you will need to consult a lawyer because you can't continue to pay out of pocket for her living there. (If thats the case) If no POA, then its the children's responsibility to call APS. I would only do it if her children do not follow thru.
We have a Trust, not a Life Estate. I am the trustee. My father made us promise to let her stay as long as she wants but there's no tenancy clause in the trust, we're just trying to honor our dad's wishes. We pay the home insurance, property taxes, lawn care, and cover any maintenance issues that come up. When my dad started declining, he made me his durable POA and I helped him set all the recurring bills to auto pay so she doesn't have to worry about them. Considering her condition, we didn't expect her kids would want her to stay in the home alone. Now it's become our responsibility and we've reached a point where we going above and beyond what we promised our dad.
I have contacted APS but their response has been disappointingly slow. I suspect she won't answer the door anyway if APS attempts a well check. I did offer to meet them there since I have a key, so we'll see if they agree to that or not. I should hear from them next week.
Again, thank you for engaging with me today! It's been helpful to vent a little. :) I'll try to remember to stop in again with an update.
I would make it clear to APS you feel she is now a danger to both herself and your property.
I hope you will update us after the case is hopefully turned to APS.
Best wishes for you.
1) Be absolutely certain that you understand the legal situation. We’ve had the words ‘lease’ (perhaps done by admin), ‘’trust’, ‘life interest’, and ‘father’s wishes’. They are all different. You need to be exact about this.
2) Assuming ‘trust’, who are the ultimate beneficiaries of the trust? You, you and your step-siblings, or a charity? It makes a difference in negotiations.
3) Are you on good terms with your step-siblings? A plea to APS from all of you might have more effect. Your obvious interest is the money, their obvious interest is like APS - their mother’s welfare.
4) What is the lady’s financial situation, apart from the substantial $ value of her ‘right’ to stay in the house? Could she afford a lovely AL or Senior Living, would she be eligible for medicaid, could she buy or lease a smaller place? Another issue in negotiations.
5) Are your step-siblings serious about having her to live with them? It’s often a bad idea, especially if they aren’t now on good terms, but it is an obvious issue in terms of options.
6) Are you prepared to negotiate a pay-out of some type for her if she agrees to go? Of course you would like her just to leave, and leave you with the whole value of the house, but it may not work out like that.
7) Do you need to pay all the bills for the house? If you stop paying, could it force a sale? Even just pressure? There are obvious down sides, but it could be a way to shake things up.
I’d suggest that you work through all these points, and involved your step-siblings in the discussions. If you all can come up with a good option that is difficult to argue with, a rather nasty option is to take it to a lawyer and get a couple of ‘frightener’ letters. They might work. I wouldn’t suggest this, except that if the lady is only 79, you may have many years of problems ahead of you.
Like I said, it’s a tricky one. Best wishes, Margaret
Although the trust makes it a condition that the stepmother can remain living in the house, without knowing all the facts, it would make sense to say that the stepmother doesn't have any actual property rights in the house. If this is so, then she can't have a life estate in the house either. A close and careful reading of the trust may have some answers in it.
It sounds like the father's kids and the mother's kids are all on the same page about getting her help. The hard part will be to get her to cooperate. From CedarStix's description, she doesn't seem to be of sound mind.
As far as the trust, right now its terms allow your stepmother to live in the house as long as she wants. Undoubtedly, your father had her best interests in mind when he included that provision in the trust. However, one could reasonably argue that staying there now in her condition in no longer beneficial to her.
A rather extreme possibility is for you as trustee to decant the trust. If your state law allows for decanting, you can remove the assets from the present trust and pour them into a new trust in which you as the trustee have made changes to the original trust's terms -- including changes to beneficial interests. Any changes must be made within limitations in the decanting law.
Be warned that decanting can have tax and other implications, so anyone considering it really should consult a trust and estate attorney. In fact, you may want to consult with the attorney who drafted the original trust.
Most likely, decanting the trust will not be necessary but it's an interesting thought. Best wishes to you, your stepmother, and her kids.
The above are suggestions and not legal advice.
If she hasn't already, CedarStix should examine the precise terms of the trust, which we will assume is what her father intended. For example, he might have set it up that the house could not be sold and the proceeds split among his three children until his wife had died or left the premises not to return. He may have made this a condition of liquidating the assets and distributing them to the beneficiaries. No one but CedarStix and any attorney she engages will know this. If the trust terms are unclear, CedarStix, et al, can petition the court to decide what the father intended.
The complication is that her stepmother seems to no longer be able to care for herself and damage to the house and to herself is proof of that. It is a blessing that her children and the father's children agree that she needs intervention and care.
The reality is that what you can do, and what you will be entitled to receive, will depend upon whether she has an interest in the house and what that is.
If she has an ownership stake in the house then the proceeds would go to her care. If she doesn’t own the house but was just promised the right to stay then you are better off contacting an attorney than this forum.
Be careful about getting APS, social workers, or even doctors involved at this stage. Your first call should be to an attorney.
The OP has made it clear enough that the family's first concern is for her stepmother's wellbeing; and it's hardly selfish or callous for the OP also to look forward to getting rid of the administrative headaches in due course.
The stepmother is a stroke survivor, recently widowed and now without a caregiver. The lady is declining support from her own family and struggling with activities of daily living.
A request for a welfare check, ideally coming from the lady's own children, should indeed be the first step.
In my state - Louisiana- usufructs are really common for 2nd/3rd wives or long term girlfriend situation and tend to involve old family property or a weekend home. Even if in another state. It’s a way for dad to look Jr straight up and tell Jr that he is inheriting the house but omitting the details “that woman” gets to stay there till whenever and Jr has to pay all property costs as Jr “owns” it. If this happens, Really in my experience, everyone needs to get real kumbaya real fast or Jr will need to come up with a $ figure amenable to buy her out. Not upon sale of property nonsense either but cash her out before ever trying to sell it. Jr cannot show it or sell it easily as comes with forever tenant.
Usufructs are solvable but everyone needs to be competent and cognitive and civil. I think - in my not an attorney opinion - that your situation if it is a usufruct is way way more complicated as she is not competent or cognitive to negotiate with you to leave and be compensated plus you do not have existing relationship with her to get her to get the healthcare she needs. If you call APS and her kids want to get real huffy, they can go into you did these actions to primarily benefit yourself….. that You wrenched her out of her home that she has legal right to stay in, yada yada. So that being said, I’d suggest that you talk with the neighbors….that hopefully there will be a neighbor or two who has known them as a couple and now very concerned about her living situation and they contact APS &/or fire dept/LEO for a wellness check on her. Then afterwards you contact APS as to what follow up you can do to help her. Also do reach out to her kids to let them know you want to help your late dads wife.
If there’s a usufruct, and her kids become aware that having one provides for a negotiation point for their mom to get $ and you do anything they view as untowards to her, they can drag this out in court…. and all the while you have to pay all property taxes, insurance, utilities etc on the place.