Are you sure you want to exit? Your progress will be lost.
Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
✔
I acknowledge and authorize
✔
I consent to the collection of my consumer health data.*
✔
I consent to the sharing of my consumer health data with qualified home care agencies.*
*If I am consenting on behalf of someone else, I have the proper authorization to do so. By clicking Get My Results, you agree to our Privacy Policy. You also consent to receive calls and texts, which may be autodialed, from us and our customer communities. Your consent is not a condition to using our service. Please visit our Terms of Use. for information about our privacy practices.
Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
My mother lives in her own home in King City. She walks a mile a day with her dog, but is very lonely and depressed. She is requesting a companion, and maybe do light housework.
I might post something on the church bulletin board or ask at your local grade school. May be someone looking for part time work while kids their kids are in school.
Pam, that is a really dumb suggestion. The woman walks a mile a day, hardly ready for assisted living. Yes, put someone in an AL who is probably living in a house that is paid off. Put on your thinking cap.
That's like saying I have a cavity, so have all your teeth pulled out and get dentures...sigh.
Patrice, that is a great idea. Hiring a part time college student who could do some housework and also provide someone to talk to. Church is also a good idea.
This woman isn't ready for A/L by any means, there are plenty of us(myself included) who aren't walking a mile a day.
I agree with Pam, maybe it is time for your Mom to be in the next phase of living, to be with others from her own generation, new people to meet and be friends with, activities, dining together, etc. plus go walking with other residents who walk their own dogs :) ... be it independent living or assistant living or retirement community or continuing care housing [different areas call it different things].
I am just curious, has anybody ever been able to hire a college student to be an Aide to an elder? What would an 89 have in common to talk about with a 19 or 20 year old? Yes, that student could do light housekeeping but they would also need time to work on their studies. How much companionship would there be?
Please take note that your Mom is able to work her dog at 89, but all that could change quickly. My parents use to walk 2 miles a day, every day, until my Dad had a heart attack. Those walking days are now history. And my parents are bored silly being in their own home being in their 90's now. How sad they are missing out on new friendships and clubs to join if they had moved to a retirement community.... [sigh]
Sorry Frequent Flyer, you can't force someone into an AL, and if I was walking a mile a day I would tell whomever suggested that to stick it where the sun don't shine.
To answer your question yes, you underestimate young people and the elderly. Many young people are interested in the old days, once they start to see pictures of the elderly person at their age, something clicks.
Ever heard of the book/movie "Tuesday Afternoons with Maurie"? It was about that and a true story, a younger man reunites with old college professor who is elderly and ill and they become friends.
OP, you have several options before making the leap into an AL. You also have to factor in the financial situation. I'm guessing the mother's house is paid off, why start spending money for an AL that is going to be at least $4 or 5K a month at this point.
Many years ago I lived with a friend of the families father, not caregiving, the family just wanted someone in the house with him, I was just out of college and he was in his 80s, we became buddies. The family noticed that he perked up having someone in the house with him. It was a great situation both ways, I had free rent in a beautiful home, so I could work and start paying off student loans, and he had a companion to talk to. He cooked and I did the dishes...LOL.
I bet you can find someone, even if it is just a few days a week, you start with simple solutions first.
Try your local University. Here in Chicago, Northwestern students developed a brand new program that pre-screens college students who need a place to stay and will help out with chores and such for a room. Just another idea.
If your mother is able to walk at her age, she probably won't need assistant living for a while. She might look into an Independent living apartment. Some have meal and some don't. They don't here and I am on Meals on Wheels. The food is OK. Where do you live?
Freqflyer, I am happy to report that young and old have mixed very well for us. Not only the children in our family with their grandparents but also with the great aunts and unclues. My father loves to talk to any younger adults who come into the house. I think if your mom is a social person, she will figure it out and if unable to speak liket mom with dementia, polishing nails, reading, etc. can be done by someone from amy age group.
A senior center would be a good way to meet others. Please utilize the dept of aging regarding opportunities. My mother is in a "grandparents program " at a daycare. She is the grandma of the class and essentially helps get the kids settled or cut out things for the kids. Mom is 82 yrs old and loves it
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
That's like saying I have a cavity, so have all your teeth pulled out and get dentures...sigh.
Patrice, that is a great idea. Hiring a part time college student who could do some housework and also provide someone to talk to. Church is also a good idea.
This woman isn't ready for A/L by any means, there are plenty of us(myself included) who aren't walking a mile a day.
I am just curious, has anybody ever been able to hire a college student to be an Aide to an elder? What would an 89 have in common to talk about with a 19 or 20 year old? Yes, that student could do light housekeeping but they would also need time to work on their studies. How much companionship would there be?
Please take note that your Mom is able to work her dog at 89, but all that could change quickly. My parents use to walk 2 miles a day, every day, until my Dad had a heart attack. Those walking days are now history. And my parents are bored silly being in their own home being in their 90's now. How sad they are missing out on new friendships and clubs to join if they had moved to a retirement community.... [sigh]
To answer your question yes, you underestimate young people and the elderly. Many young people are interested in the old days, once they start to see pictures of the elderly person at their age, something clicks.
Ever heard of the book/movie "Tuesday Afternoons with Maurie"? It was about that and a true story, a younger man reunites with old college professor who is elderly and ill and they become friends.
OP, you have several options before making the leap into an AL. You also have to factor in the financial situation. I'm guessing the mother's house is paid off, why start spending money for an AL that is going to be at least $4 or 5K a month at this point.
Many years ago I lived with a friend of the families father, not caregiving, the family just wanted someone in the house with him, I was just out of college and he was in his 80s, we became buddies. The family noticed that he perked up having someone in the house with him. It was a great situation both ways, I had free rent in a beautiful home, so I could work and start paying off student loans, and he had a companion to talk to. He cooked and I did the dishes...LOL.
I bet you can find someone, even if it is just a few days a week, you start with simple solutions first.
Just another idea.
See All Answers