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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
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She also helps my stepfather with some cooking and help he needs ( he’s hard of hearing and losing his eyesight). Does anyone have experience with this situation?
It happened to me when I first got started in the field. I was taking care of a stroke victim who had mild cognitive decline. It was her son's nitwit girlfriend who got jealous. I pitched in and cleaned the kitchen including sweeping and mopping the floor. The both of them were heavy drinkers and the son got tore up drunk that night that resulted in a knock down drag out fight with the girlfriend. The girlfriend accused the man of looking at me and broke all the dishes in the kitchen. The next day I arrived for my shift, I called the office and told them what happened and that I was not staying. I took care of my client and left shortly thereafter. I told the couple you guys trashed your place you clean it up. I'll see you tomorrow.
I had a female client recently who kept cancelling her shifts because her husband would come out of his shell and start laughing and talking with me. She would tell him to stop talking and leave out the house.
Women are very territorial over their homes. So, I would tread lightly around these green eyed monsters.
GiGigrl, same thing happened with my Mom. The first day the caregiver was there, the caregiver prepared dinner for my parents. My Mom grabbed the plate from Dad, and threw everything on the plate into the trash. No other women was going to cook for her husband !!
My Mom was offended, like she felt people were thinking she could no longer care for her house (honestly, she couldn't at 97 years old) or care for her husband. My parents were still somewhat sharp for their age, but they had slowed down quite a bit which happens when one ages. But jealously didn't slow down, it only got worse.
Did your step-dad use an Agency to find a caregiver? Some Agencies will send out a different person each day, then your folks could choose which person worked out the best for them, then would be scheduled full-time. My Dad had two caregivers that helped him for close to a year. Both had a sense of humor that Dad liked, and who would laugh at his Dad jokes.
I got fired as a caregiver once because the husband called me his wife. The agency ended up putting more younger caregivers at this house instead of middle aged caregivers.
Women are very territorial and it's hard on them to see them doing the work that they want to do. They feel like they are being replaced.
Hello freqflyer, thanks for responding to my question. No, my step-dad didn’t go through an agency. A friend of his spouse had used this caregiver for a few weeks before her husband passed and the spouse had recommended this caregiver. They have another caregiver that fills in on her off days who is much younger (mid-20’s) than the major caregiver and Mom doesn’t have a problem with her. It sounds like this is something that is not going to get better over time. Not sure if step-dad is willing to try someone new.
As I said earlier one man I took care of wife's was mad because the husband called me his wife.
I was there for him, and she was not very nice right from the start. I don't I could have done much that would of help. I should of probably tried bonding with her more, but doubtful that would of helped.
I think probably younger caregivers is the best option
When I care for a partnered female dementia client. I befriend her. I ask her about her life tell her about mine and spend minimal time with the spouse. When one became jealous I took her hands made eye contact and told her she was my friend and that I loved her and I would never do that to my friends. Never came up again.
My mother was convinced that once she passed, dad was going to marry "Honey," their cleaning lady / companion to mom. Instead, a few months later, dad stood in the place of Honey's deceased father as "honorary father" at her wedding.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I had a female client recently who kept cancelling her shifts because her husband would come out of his shell and start laughing and talking with me. She would tell him to stop talking and leave out the house.
Women are very territorial over their homes. So, I would tread lightly around these green eyed monsters.
My Mom was offended, like she felt people were thinking she could no longer care for her house (honestly, she couldn't at 97 years old) or care for her husband. My parents were still somewhat sharp for their age, but they had slowed down quite a bit which happens when one ages. But jealously didn't slow down, it only got worse.
Did your step-dad use an Agency to find a caregiver? Some Agencies will send out a different person each day, then your folks could choose which person worked out the best for them, then would be scheduled full-time. My Dad had two caregivers that helped him for close to a year. Both had a sense of humor that Dad liked, and who would laugh at his Dad jokes.
I got fired as a caregiver once because the husband called me his wife. The agency ended up putting more younger caregivers at this house instead of middle aged caregivers.
Women are very territorial and it's hard on them to see them doing the work that they want to do. They feel like they are being replaced.
I was there for him, and she was not very nice right from the start. I don't I could have done much that would of help. I should of probably tried bonding with her more, but doubtful that would of helped.
I think probably younger caregivers is the best option