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My mother is in skilled nursing with Parkinson's and now dementia. She has hallucinations or ideas that alternately sadden and / or terrify her. Lately, she has begun wailing, crying, and screaming. Thankfully, she is small and weak because she is also often combative. This goes on for hours every day. The staff are wonderful, but it's hard on them. It's hard on the other residents, and I know it's hard on my mom!


I have a camera in her room, and can see all of this, but am powerless to do anything. Even if I could go there, I could do nothing.


The worst (?) part is that after my mother retired, she went to this same nursing home every week to visit people, and when I went with her she made me promise that I would never let her get "like this." (Like the people who behave like the she is behaving now!)


What would you do?

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I'd call her doctor right away to report this behavioral change and to get his advice. She may be suffering from a UTI infection but if not, it sounds like she needs some medication to calm her down and reduce her anxiety & terror. You may be powerless to do anything for her right now, but her doctor is not!

Wishing you the best of luck in getting help for your mom!~
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Allow me to add that they are adjusting her meds all the time. She is currently on depakote(sp), which they just increased by 33%.
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Have her checked for a UTI as this may worsen dementia symptoms and can be cleared up with antibiotics. Even if she just recovered from a UTI, it is quite common to get them very often and there sometimes are no other symptoms other than behavior/cognitive. My poor MIL was getting 1 a month until I put her on maintenance D-Mannose and she hasn't had one since. I wish you solutions!
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I'm so sorry to see this. It must be very concerning. I'd stay in daily contact inquiring about the meds. They likely will say it will take a while for the medication adjustment to take affect. I'd ask if there is something temporary they can use to help with her mental distress that will work right now, until that happens. You are right to be on top of this. Mental anguish is serious. You are being a great advocate. I hope you'll see improvement soon.
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