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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I'm personally NOT a fan of being surprised. In fact, I hate it, even with 'good' surprises (with the exception of the 'surprise' of a new grandbaby on the way!) but pretty much, anything that rocks my boat, so to speak, is not appreciated.
Depending on mom's memory abilities, I would do as much as possible to make the change to a facility as much her choice as you can. Of course she probably can't do the research, etc., but she can go tour places and give her input.
She will adjust better if she feels she has SOME control. A dear friend just moved out of her home into a lovely ALF. She made the calls and she is happy as can be. But, SHE made the choice herself. I realize that's not always possible.
How cognizant is she on a day to day basis? Does she understand and retain some things but not others? You can tell her that she needs help. You can not do everything for her that she needs. You can tell her that you want to keep her safe. Have you picked a place yet? If so has she visited? Can you arrange for her to go a few times as Adult Day Care? This way she will get to know the place, the staff will get to know her a bit. That might be one way to "ease" her in. If she does not retain much it does not matter when you tell her or if you "surprise her" it will be a surprise since she will probably not recall that you have told her previously. When you do move her in try to keep items that she is familiar with so she will have a 'connection" of sorts.
If she has short-term memory issues, most things will "surprise" her from here on in. Our priority for my MIL with the same issue is do and say what keeps her calm, in the moment, so that it allows forward movement of whatever needs to happen. That said, after transitioning her into AL in 2016 and now LTC, we still get surprised by some of the "short-term" things she will remember from recent days or weeks ago, but it's not predictable. At first you might not "feel good" about telling her "therapeutic fibs" or half-truths, but think of it as being medically necessary. There isn't a wrong way. Do what works for her and her caregiver in the moment.
Depends on her ability to understand and retain things. If she can understand/retain, I would still give as little notice as possible. It's 99% likely that she will not want to go and will give you a hard time. How long do you want to listen to that?
If she does not retain, I would probably just load her up in the car, bring her over, get her settled, and then leave.
Regardless, it's probably going to be a very hard time and transition for YOU. Be gentle with yourself and remember why you are doing this. If she's mad, she will get over it. She'll adjust, as well as she can, to her new surroundings.
And you will know that she is. being taken care of and is safe. And you get to re-establish your life.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Depending on mom's memory abilities, I would do as much as possible to make the change to a facility as much her choice as you can. Of course she probably can't do the research, etc., but she can go tour places and give her input.
She will adjust better if she feels she has SOME control. A dear friend just moved out of her home into a lovely ALF. She made the calls and she is happy as can be. But, SHE made the choice herself. I realize that's not always possible.
You can tell her that she needs help. You can not do everything for her that she needs. You can tell her that you want to keep her safe.
Have you picked a place yet?
If so has she visited?
Can you arrange for her to go a few times as Adult Day Care? This way she will get to know the place, the staff will get to know her a bit. That might be one way to "ease" her in.
If she does not retain much it does not matter when you tell her or if you "surprise her" it will be a surprise since she will probably not recall that you have told her previously.
When you do move her in try to keep items that she is familiar with so she will have a 'connection" of sorts.
If she does not retain, I would probably just load her up in the car, bring her over, get her settled, and then leave.
Regardless, it's probably going to be a very hard time and transition for YOU. Be gentle with yourself and remember why you are doing this. If she's mad, she will get over it. She'll adjust, as well as she can, to her new surroundings.
And you will know that she is. being taken care of and is safe. And you get to re-establish your life.