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She has severe pain in groin and has had it for almost two months, all she does is cry in severe pain and has had every test known to man kind. They are saying now it’s from her bad back but the neurosurgeon said he won’t touch her back because it is so bad. My sister and I are at our wits end in knowing where or what to do. Her bones are literally crumbling.

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So sorry that your mom, and you, are suffering so much!

I hope, hope, hope that she can get and will take the pain meds to make her life tolerable!
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My mom also had severe RA and I was her only caregiver...her doctor kept adding pain pills(180 addictive pills a month) after he retired we were in a mess. Her bones were also crumbling and 2 halos later...her c1-c2 vertebrae nearly collapsed almost killing her... the doc who now took over her care went ballistic with the 180 Percocet a month... I was desperate and heard of a anesthesiologist who saw patients in extreme pain and documented history.. this is what happened..she was amazed my moms luver hadn’t failed... weened her off Percocet and put her on methadone one at bedtime and one in a.m. with 15 mg of OxyContin 1-2 times per day and we worked on adjustments together..3 Percocet added...only if needed... when adjustments were made to fit her need, my mom had a comfortable pain level in 35 yrs.. she never had remission in all that time...when she had extreme groin pain we finally found out after many evaluations...she had a fractured pubic bone... who would have thought.. she lost almost 30 lbs during that painful ordeal... I wish we had known about the anesthesiologist then...pain is no joke and I thought it would do me in before her... this doc said she would implant a morphine pump but her meds plan was great... if course we used lidocaine patches as necessary whoever needed and her comfort level was maintained until she passed away...drs are so concerned about addiction and say they should prescribe in an emergency... I told the dr every minute of extreme pain is an emergency and we didn’t care about that..her condition warranted that...I was persistent and a pain to many but I demanded appropriate pain relief and told the dr he wasn’t treating a crack head but a woman in pain extremis...I could go on and on but the anesthesiologist saved our sanity...please try finding an anesthesiologist who specializes in severe cases... not a pain clinic..seriously I’ll pain patients deserve relief... I understand your situation..I lived it... I hope this gives u some helpful info...dlm
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bigsispjt Jul 2019
Thank you. My mom has been extreme pain for years. I had to report an ER doctor because he wouldn't address her pain. Everyone is so afraid of getting sued.
Three years forward today she is on such heavy narcotics we're amazed she can function. But she's still in pain. So now they're going to give her an epidural.
I'll certainly mentioned the method suggested her. Thank you.
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My mother has severe spinal stenosis and sciatica. She had excruciating pain for quite a few years. I took her to Mass General, Spine centers, had epidurals with blocks, pain med etc. The doctors said my mothers back was the worst back they have ever seen they compared her back to someone with cancer. I felt so sad for my mom. One day on a bus I met a business woman and she told me about a natural product that helps with pain. I ordered the product and she took the supplement with the doctors permission for about half year and half her pain subsided. Another six months her pain was totally gone. This to me was a miracle. My prayers were answered. My mother is pain free for about10 years now.
The company name is Market America. The products I use are a total of three.
OPC
Vitamin B Complex
Multivitamin
All three are from Isotonix Mix with water and drink it in the am. Follow directions on the bottle. Check with doctor before taking any supplement.
This product has helped millions of people with pain. Hope this helps.
Market America # 336-605-0040
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Kiwmil Jul 2019
Thank you for such great info I will let my mom know as I take her to her pain management dr on Tuesday!So Happy your mom is no longer in back pain! God is great🙏
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CBD oil helps me tremendously but I don’t have an RA diagnosis. I think it’s because it relaxes my body that it helps the pain.
I’ve been on a very low dosage for a year now for maintenance. I took muscle relaxers before when the spasms in my back were severe but they knocked me out. I also developed pain in my lower back that it takes away. If I am not hydrated enough, I find my joints hurt in my fingers and toes. I can add electrolytes and it really helps. I drink too much coffee and not enough water if I’m not paying attention.
My mom’s fingers and toes were cripppled from arthritis but in her very old age they no longer hurt.
I’ve been thinking of trying the “Aging Backwards” exercises by Miranda Edmond-White where the focus is on keeping the connective tissue hydrated and healthy through simple movements. When I catch her on PBS and follow along with her exercises I notice that I feel better for several days. It reminded me of an exercise book called “The Melt Method” by Sue Hitzmann which is for pain management. It seems to focus on the connective tissue as well. Hitzmann’s techniques call for the foam roller exercise aids that you roll on.
I did have the pelvic pain one time and thought it was maybe a UTI. Turned out it wasn’t and the pain moved to my hip ( like old Arthur will do sometimes) and then was gone. So I can sympathize with the location of your mom’s pains.
I hope she’s better soon.
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anonymous828521 Jul 2019
@97yroldmom: What great info, thanks....I'm gonna check it out!😳
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Why is she not having her pain addressed and dealt with? Are you afraid she'll be addicted? I hope not.

Untenable pain is the worst. It just sucks the soul out of you. Please get your mom to a pain management clinic ASAP. It's just cruel to spend her life moving ice packs and rubbing her with essential oils. I have mid-range osteo arthritis that is never going to get better---I have tried, for interest's sake, CBD oil, and it didn't do a single thing for me. I think if you THINK it's helping, maybe it is.

Oils and creams have their place, I suppose, but an actual opiate would ease her pain more.

People have become so terrified of addiction---it's insane. I have a friend who had knee replacement surgery and her DH would watch the clock between doses of Norco so she couldn't possibly take 'too many'. Sitting watching her CRYING because the pain was so bad and she had 15 minutes to 'wait'--made me crazy. Then she couldn't get the pain under control. I was taking care of her one day and called her doc and he said 'Oh she can take 1-2 every 4-6 hours--DO NOT let her pain get ahead of her, she won't move and then we have a whole new problem'. She was taking 1 every 6 hours. Moving the dose to 1-1/2 every 5 hours kept her pain at bay. SO WORRIED she'd become an addict.

Don't do that to poor mom, OK?

BTW--most drs will say it's fine to use oils, etc, but will want you to use something that really cuts through the pain. Mostly, with oils, it's the massaging that feels good.
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Hi. I. Sorry your mom is in such horrible pain. Is your mom on hospice? Morphine pills help with the use of Ativan and morphine syringes through out the day. That seemed to help a person I knew that had the same . She was in hospice and that is what they gave her for pain .
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Thank all of you who have given me ideas for 82 year old mom with severe RA! She sees an RA doctor and has for years she is being seen by pain management and has been she gets infusions and was in the hospital for a week, she had a steroid injection in her low back during hospital stay, She has scoliosis and was using pain patches(not sure what they were) but was hallucinating with them. She is now using otc pain patches,lyrica,hydrocodone! Her pain has subsided since hospital stay . Mom lives with sister so she is being taken care of that way, I do all dr appts and help while sister is at work,mom has her mind Thank you Jesus🙏 But we just couldn’t handle her 😭 crying so sad! I haven’t heard of a few of the procedures a few of you have put on this email but I will be checking them out. Thank you for your support💗
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I'm not sure, but could any steroids or nerve blocks help mom? I hate this for you. So sorry for mom's pain & I will pray for relief for mom & you.
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Kiwmil Jul 2019
Thank you Tiger 55!
we will be seeing her pain management next week and will be discussing a few of these different procedures! Her pain has let up since her hospital stay and injection she recd while there! 🙏 are greatly appreciated!
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What do her orthopedist and her geriatrician say? She could see a pain management doctor also. She needs relief from that kind of pain. My goodness!
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Your mom should be seeing a Rheumatologist and at her age a geriatrician. My 92 yo mom has debilitating RA and at this point she can no longer own and close her hands. the pain is unbearable for her now. She lives in Assisted Living but was put on hospice back in April. Pain is being managed through hospice and mom’s geriatrician. Good luck.
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I also have R.A. But I’m on Humira to stop the pain. My sister gave me a jar of cream with CB Oil in it and I applied it to my hand that was hurting and it did take the pain away. You would have to check with your Mom’s doctor to make sure it doesn’t interfere with any medications she is on before giving it to her. I hope you are taking your Mom to a Rheumatologist, if not then find one for her. Pain is not fun but Ice packs do help and so does a hot bath with Epsom Salts, soak for about 45 minutes.
Good Luck
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Kiwmil Jul 2019
Hello msgarrett,Thank you, and yes my sister and I have discussed this with her pc doctor and she is not apposed to the idea of cbd oils. I am into essential oils and have made her many of nerve pain creams and others but have not tried cbd yet. We will be discussing this with pain management when we see her next week so I can put it in her creams I make!🙏Thanks again
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I have severe pain from rheumatoid arthritis, diabetic neuropathy, and nerve damage from being attacked by a dog. I cannot take opioid drugs for pain medications. And, I do not want the side effects from pain pills so I use ice at night so that I can sleep. I also work part-time at the hospital as a psychologist and I cannot work if I can’t pass random drug testing.
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Kiwmil Jul 2019
Hi Becky, I am sorry you have to be in this kind of pain too. Have you tried essential oils? I have a great one that helps my mom! I hate to say it but my mom is my guinea pig for pain creams I make and different ones work for different pains in her body she is very Thankful that I make them for her.If you need a recipe I can send it to you for you to try it! I will keep you in prayer 🙏!
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My mother was screaming in pain due to vertebrae fractures of her thoracic spine. She had 5 of them over the course of 6 months due to osteoporosis. Kyphoplasty procedure saved the day, along with PT. She’s pain free today but has a very pronounced curvature of the spine. Severe groin pain can also be caused by a torn labrum of the hip.
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We used Lidoderm patches on my mom’s back & they were amazing for pain without having to go thru the digestive system. Strongest ones are by prescription but you can get some nearly as strong over the counter now. Best of luck!
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She needs Palliative care at the least. Hospice if doctor will not do surgery.
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Is there Not any Meds to Relieve this Pain? It is hard to Fathom that No one, Hun, Gave her Anything...Look more into this, Mom cannot go on with this pain.
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Patients are rarely compliant with ice packs. But are a good choice if one does not want to spend their lives so medicated as to be non-functional.

I have experienced relief from them, one thin layer of cloth between the ice and my lower back. Allows me to fall asleep, even though a treatment is recommended to last 20 min., several times a day. The good gel packs gradually lose the cold.

I don't have a diagnosis yet, do not know if I have RA, but the groin pain is the worst, really scares me.
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Kiwmil Jul 2019
Praying you do not have RA it is so debilitating! try essential oils you can find recipes on Pinterest and they do give my mom some relief. Peppermint, frankincense, wintergreen, valor, there are numerous ones to help!
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Every time I read a post about this kind of problem I wonder if this is something that may be helped by vertebroplasty or kyphoplasty - I can't forget how one poster's mother had her pain dismissed as psychological when it was actually due to crumbling spine, and how the procedure was a miraculous improvement.
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ThePlains18 Jul 2019
It isn’t a miracle for everything. Results are very individual. My own mother’s “successful” kyphoplasty was followed almost immediately by breaks in other vertebrae one or two removed from the original in each direction.

Surgery is scary as heck at these ages, too. So risky in so many ways. My two cents, and I do not post much.
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There are some fairly large gel packs available that can be either cooled in the freezer or heated in the microwave. Some of them come in sleeves that allow you to wrap them around knees of your mid section to help hold them in place on your knee/shoulder/back. You need to be very careful not to get them too hot or cold; my mother likes at least one thickness of a towel between the pack and her skin whether hot or cold. We have found the use of the gel packs reduces inflammation and helps with the associated pain. We found taking a dose of pain medication and using the gel packs at the same time gave greater and longer relief than just pain medication or just gel packs. Because sometimes my parents got relief from just the gel packs, for episodes of pain, we usually start with the gel packs and add a dose of medication 30-60 minutes in as needed. Although my mother likes cold on her knees and heat on her back, I understand that either helps promote improved circulation and reduces inflammatory based chronic pain.

If the person is still mobile enough, a hot bath/shower or a hot whirlpool bath often helps too. Again not too hot, elderly skin is delicate and burns easily. My sister-in-law with RA recently got a walk in tub with a whirlpool and says it helps a lot. but she is in pain a lot these days because her medication has been cut by 75%. Gentle massages and range of motion flexion can help RA too.
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No one should have to live in that kind of pain!

She needs to be on some serious pain meds, ASAP!
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You need to see a pain management doctor.
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