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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Similar dynamics except I live with the elderly person and provide 100% of care. But a sibling has POA, and is executor. Sibling doesn't speak to me and is critical (behind my back) of decisions. Sibling has a "leave them be" mindset and will never authorize any careg assistance or support. These family dynamics really make an extremely hard situation a lot harder. I wish I knew the answer.
If your sister, the POA is not providing a safe environment for your mother that can be reported to APS. You could also contact the Attorney that handled the original paperwork, or your own attorney and start the process of becoming your mom's Guardian. However if your sister is providing care for mom. Mom is safe. This also means that mom is NOT left alone at any time then I think you would have a difficult time proving that she is not providing proper care. Generally a Nursing Home or Skilled Nursing facility is not needed for a person with dementia. What is needed is Memory Care facility.
The POA has fallen to your Sister. So it is up to her. Is your Mother living alone? What dangers do you feel she is in at this time? Could you fill us in a little?
You don't say if your mother is incompetent to manage her own affairs, but I'm going to assume that for now.
This is not where to start but realize that if the sibling with the financial power of attorney refuses to pay for services or items necessary for your mother's wellbeing, you can petition the court challenging the sibling's failure to act in your mother's best interests. The court also will be able to look at the POA to see the terms your mother set up. If the court decides that the current agent is failing her duty, it will most likely assign a guardian. This is all expensive and time consuming, and means that someone has to be willing to step into the role of guardian, which is why trying to resolve this out of court is a really good idea.
It may be better to scare your sister straight by involving adult protective services. As a matter of fact, an APS investigation may show you that your mother does not need to go to a nursing home. Before you go the APS route, talk to someone at the agency in the county where your mother lives about what is involved in enforcing an APS protective order. It is not a magic wand.
If your sister would agree, mediation can be very helpful. You and her sister and any others involved in decision making sit with a neutral third party who manages a conversation among you with the aim of coming to a mutual agreement.
My mother is legally blind. She has sundowner, dementia and alzheimer's. She has lost her memory at 24 at a time or a bit longer. She can not take care of any meals , dressing slef , regular house chores. Can not properly bath self. Can not go out of house for any reason on her own. Can not shop , has no transportation, can not see to spend money or bills. Her mind comes and goes at times. Has a memory loss of certain things or at time to time. This is the first time I have reached publicly for answers. I apologize if I didn't give enough information the first time. That was a start for me getting some answers. I appreciate each one of your responses.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
However if your sister is providing care for mom. Mom is safe. This also means that mom is NOT left alone at any time then I think you would have a difficult time proving that she is not providing proper care.
Generally a Nursing Home or Skilled Nursing facility is not needed for a person with dementia. What is needed is Memory Care facility.
Is your Mother living alone?
What dangers do you feel she is in at this time?
Could you fill us in a little?
This is not where to start but realize that if the sibling with the financial power of attorney refuses to pay for services or items necessary for your mother's wellbeing, you can petition the court challenging the sibling's failure to act in your mother's best interests. The court also will be able to look at the POA to see the terms your mother set up. If the court decides that the current agent is failing her duty, it will most likely assign a guardian. This is all expensive and time consuming, and means that someone has to be willing to step into the role of guardian, which is why trying to resolve this out of court is a really good idea.
It may be better to scare your sister straight by involving adult protective services. As a matter of fact, an APS investigation may show you that your mother does not need to go to a nursing home. Before you go the APS route, talk to someone at the agency in the county where your mother lives about what is involved in enforcing an APS protective order. It is not a magic wand.
If your sister would agree, mediation can be very helpful. You and her sister and any others involved in decision making sit with a neutral third party who manages a conversation among you with the aim of coming to a mutual agreement.
Her mind comes and goes at times. Has a memory loss of certain things or at time to time.
This is the first time I have reached publicly for answers. I apologize if I didn't give enough information the first time. That was a start for me getting some answers.
I appreciate each one of your responses.