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You may find it good to drink warm milk before bed time read a book and mellow your self out lay down close your eyes slowly relax your body first your feet up to your knees then little by little till your at your head see your self on a beach and try and hear the waves hit the shore relax soon you will sleep soundly you are the only one who can destress your self if possible stay away from anything but natural ways to do this yes we all have keyed up times but we can master them in time
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Jody's recommendation about listening to sounds is good too. I have a small gadget that has several sounds to choose from (ie) ocean waves, thunderstorm, gentle rain, with an automatic timer that shuts off after 30 minutes. It's very calming.
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Oh sleep! What is THAT? My mother is getting worse dementia-wise, markedly so. She lives in an AL and I've been her "person" for four and a half years now. No sib help and she's a narcissist.

That's enough for one person but I have other stuff. My son is graduating from high school in 10 days and I have a big party to plan in June, plus tons of college stuff, financial, paperwork, visits, obligations, etc. - and she just doesn't understand, or care, about that stuff at all. Just be sure you're here every other day to bring me my meals, clean my toilet, etc. All the stuff she doesn't 'trust' the AL staff to get done correctly. Ahem...

When I told her that I need a job to help my son with college, she shut down and quit talking to me. That hurts so bad. Yet she still expects me to do my duty when she has a dining room and staff on hand.

I don't sleep well either. Yuck!
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For some reason I cannot unsubscribe from this question after adding my comment.....
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dad's grandson went through that; sueber48, glad your doc was willing to give you Xanax; what he took as well
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What's sleep?
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Also it may be helpful to you to know that historically, humans as a matter of course woke up during that 2-3 am time and stayed awake for an hour or two, before going back under for the "second sleep." Apparently it was often a time of great creativity, where people wrote, read, had a snack, played a musical instrument, or even visited with neighbors. Here are a couple of helpful articles bbc/news/magazine-16964783 and aeon/magazine/psychology/why-broken-sleep-is-a-golden-time-for-creativity/
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I just read that somewhere else recently - I wonder what time they woke up the 2nd time, though
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I fall asleep on the couch or my eyes start closing while sitting at the computer, but I resist going to bed like the dickens. Sometimes it's because I like the quiet of the night (unless it's a weekend, during which time I'm anticipating (negatively) loud music and rucus partying that will keep me awake, so I can never really relax and go to sleep. Sometimes I'm trying to catch up on self employment work and am stressed out by deadlines or needing to market my business orfollow up on leads. Other times I crash but am awakened by mom in the middle of the night. Occasionally I will force myself to go to bed at a decent hour and it does make a difference to my ability to function the next day, although I always feel a certain level of fatigue. Strangely enough, smells keep me awake at night - second hand smoke, mould, cooking odours, incense, plastic/gasoline or other chemical smells. I feel more physically uncomfortable in bed; I wish I had one of those beds where I can elevate my head and thoracic region of my back. Of course, post menopause doesn't help - I can feel hot internally while skin on my arms can feel cold at the same time. Getting back to the second part of the question - i.e. while caregiving - certainly listening for cues of distress from my mother - talking or crying in her sleep, getting up and rummaging through papers, going to the washroom, taking out meet from the freezer to thaw out - make it difficult for me to let go. Yet sometimes I am so tired/sleepy I just can't get up, so I'm half awake and half asleep worrying and feeling guilty at the same time.
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Combine the caregiver situation with chronic unemployment for extreme stress-related problems; then it is time for your doctor and perhaps some counseling.
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Dumb me. That is what lack of sleep gets me. I finally see where the unsubscribe link is. Sometimes it seems I will never get enough sleep to stop being airheaded at times....Something none of us need when we have so much responsibility.
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While caring for my terminally ill partner, i was up all night he was terrified of veing alone, terrified of going to sleep, and so i was a virtual prisoner in my own home, hed finally drift off around 4:30am, so for years after he passed away, i could not sleep til 4:30am. I am now in a proper sleeping pattern, 9pm til 5am. Occasionally waking up for the loo. But it took years to get back into a more natural routine. Yes caring for someone can cause insomnia, their worries are yours, plus you have your own worries. caring for someone is a difficult job, family or not.
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