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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
They refuse to go to a nursing home and one has dementia really bad. There is nobody in the family that can care for them in their own home because everybody has to work. Also nobody has the financial resourses to pay for sitters.
You call your local area agency on aging and ask for help.
Does anyone have POA? Would they accept a small bit of help, like a laundress or cleaning help, introduced as a friend? Sometimes you have to be creative in getting a foot in the door.
You may, sadly, have to wait for a fall or other mishap to occur, at which point you enlist the aid of the discharge department to find them a suitable placement. Just make sure that discharge understands what their actual living situation is like, and that there is not a nearby child able to provide assistance on an ongoing basis.
Have you sat down with them to find out why they are running help off? Receiving help is very difficult for seniors, it is seen as a loss of control. I know a lot of times we as caregivers are task oriented, we see help is needed and we want to give it, a lot of times we do not pause when we see resistance to find out WHY. I would start there, find out why. Also, them to have involvement as to who can help and how they can help, make sure they are as involved as possible in the decision making process of their care, that might help the situation out a lot.
ask what they hate about having a caregiver if just don't want one tell them the state will be called and they will go to a nursing home if they keep this up. we need you safe first happy second. good luck
buddylab, are your parents refusing help that is sent to the door because the help is of a different ethic group, etc? My parents are of that generation that they don't trust anyone unless that person is of their own ethic group, and own religion. My parents have made it quite clear they don't like their primary doctor because that doctor is a woman.... [sigh].
One lesson I learned was to include Dad in the selection process. When we selected people he sent them packing. This included a cousin who does elder care for a living. She cooked him the food he grew up with and loved. It didn't matter. We learned to screen people and then give him the choice. That seemed to work a whole lot better.
Is it possible that someone else is giving them advice? It turned out that there was a woman who we had fired as a care giver who was staying in his house at times. He did not want a live-in person because this woman was telling him she would take care of him. She wanted a free room to stay to avoid a long commute.
As Babalou says, you may have to wait a while before they will accept help. Now is the time to get the paperwork in order "just in case" so that when the fall, car crash, massive food poisoning, robbery, burglary, car theft, assault, or influenza strikes and disables they, the paperwork is done. By this I mean the DPOA. Ask their family physician to perform mental exams on them for a baseline for future reference. I've been there, it was very frustrating.
It is important to know your parents financials, as their POA, to help plan for their future. Now, I understand that most adult children feel uncomfortable about diving in to their parents personal stuff. I had to do this with my mom after she suffered a massive stroke, which left her 87% wheelchair dependent. Many elderly couples are able to live in their home with help from Medicaid. With a little bit of planning from an advocate, your parents could stay home, safely, with caregivers in place paid for by Medicaid. While waiting for Medicaid to become active, your parents would have to private pay for about 3 months for caregivers. I'm telling you this because I don't want you to think that the nursing home is the only answer; there are other options.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Does anyone have POA? Would they accept a small bit of help, like a laundress or cleaning help, introduced as a friend? Sometimes you have to be creative in getting a foot in the door.
You may, sadly, have to wait for a fall or other mishap to occur, at which point you enlist the aid of the discharge department to find them a suitable placement. Just make sure that discharge understands what their actual living situation is like, and that there is not a nearby child able to provide assistance on an ongoing basis.
Is it possible that someone else is giving them advice? It turned out that there was a woman who we had fired as a care giver who was staying in his house at times. He did not want a live-in person because this woman was telling him she would take care of him. She wanted a free room to stay to avoid a long commute.