My husband enjoys getting out, seeing others, and eating out at a nice restaurant. However, the problem is bowel incontinence. Advice?

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My husband enjoys getting out, seeing others, and eating out at a nice restaurant. However, the problem is bowel incontinence. Advice?

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know when this will happen. Yes he wears diapers, but if any of your loved one have this problem, you'll know diapers don't always do the trick for that incontinence. there is the odor and the mess. Is there someway any of you have dealt with this same issue? Is their a medication that he could take to insure this won't happen while your out? I've given him Imodium AD. I don't know if it worked we didn't have any problems that day. I want him to get out, but this is a nerve wracking issue. Any thoughts?

Incontinence

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I don't know about meds but perhaps you can try to develop some regularity by using specific foods that would cause him to go on a more regular basis, then plan your outings accordingly.

Eg, if you can give him supper with foods that contribute to a BM in the morning, you could try going to lunch and/or supper before it was time for another event.

Cheese also can be constipating, but in smaller amounts it can help regulate movement. You might give him a small amount of cheese before you go out, then balance it out with fruits when you get home.

Unfortunately, it's not an exact science.

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smcbeth1, does your hubby take over the counter vitamins? When you open the vitamin bottle take a good sniff of the pills.... if the pills smell strong then one's urine will smell strong.

As my Dad had aged he developed an intolerance to dairy products. Got him the lactose pills and lactose-free milk which helped. But trying to convince Mom not to give Dad ice cream or cottage cheese was almost impossible because she felt "a little bit won't hurt".... [sigh].

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My sister in law has had this problem for 20 yrs. She is 79. Her doctor gives her a prescription for lomotil and she takes one tab every day and it has curbed her problem. My husband has the same problem but our dr will not give it to him as he says it isn't safe. I guess they all have different opinions. Metamucil does help some. If he misses a dose I can count on him having n accident but taking it does not guarantee it won't happen. Strangly though more that half of his accidents are at night while sleeping. Good luck.

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I just went through this for the last two years. It ultimately led to outings only. We stopped going inside. I figured if we ate at an outside restaurant (casual) we could get up and leave if it happened. It was devastating for me. He never seemed to notice! He loved getting out also. I would take him to Giant for food shopping or little shopping trips to CVS, etc. But all restaurants, theaters, church, and friends houses were no longer attempted. I finally just had to put him in a home last week because he was getting combative and threatening to me and would not allow my caregiver to do anything for him. Now that he is in the home, he is much more mellow. He is happy to see me and all smiles when I go to see him. The nurse asked about the incontinence problem. I told him it has been that way for two years. I tried Immodium, Miralax to give him bulk, probiotics.......all with no success! It was the most difficult time of my life. Like I said, he never noticed what was going on! What a huge mess! God Bless him, he is happy and I am at peace!

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Been there Done that. Fortunately his problem went away - at least for now. We just couldn't go out much. It's even happened in the grocery store. I couldn't give him anything like Imodium because he would be constipated. Our doctor had no advice. There is bowel training, but didn't find that feasible. Those bowels just do their own thing whenever they want! My husband is going every 3 days or so and I am still reluctant to go out when he hasn't gone for awhile. Our daughter had suggested taking a change of clothes but that is totally impossible- you can take the clothes but no way can you clean up and change in public. Hang in there!

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I lived with issue for two years when Mom lived with me. I changed her over to a geriatric doctor who immediately recognized the bowel incontinence was due to cholesterol meds. He stopped those meds and the issue went away. So, I'd check out his meds. Mom's general MD did not find this. In fact, she had her on more meds to correct the issue which did not work. A geriatric dr knows the older body and what it can handle.

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I wonder if you can buy some kind of "charcoal" liner to help with the smell, other than that I don't know. Unless he is regular, you can always go "after" the BM, but if he is not regular, other than trying to figure out what actually triggers the BM spontaneously, I have not had to deal with that issue. Good luck.

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You might want to try Abena Abriflex pull-ons. They have an inner elastic edge that keeps the mess from spilling out as long as the person is standing. It also helps with the odor until you get out of the store. When we were in this stage, I kept several plastic underpads in the car to cover the seat until we got home to clean up the mess.

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I've noticed in my own body that I am very sensitive to artificial sweeteners. Just a few sticks of chewing gum and i need to wear a pad for leaks. I've learned to look at labels. I recently got into trouble with a "no sugar added" fruit pie that I later discovered the first ingredient in the list was sorbitol. So i wonder how much artificial sweetener might be affecting others too with loose stools and diarrhea, in addition to their meds. I can be careful and avoid the problem, lucky me; my heart goes out to the caregivers who now have to give up restaurant dining and visiting at friends' homes.

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nothing artificial can be good for our bodies and there is so many different additives to preserve stuff now-a-days, that no wonder our bodies are starting to fight back. but I guess we will all get to a point where our bodily functions lose their elasticity and we will need the help of depends.

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This hit WAY too close to home. My FIL had the same problem, we never figured it out. He LOVED to go out, but would very often have bowel incontinence. And not just a little leakage. I'd always have hubby with me, but he would almost vomit when it would happen, so I just carried huge wipes with me, tried to encourage his dad to eat small meals and keep the length of time we were in the restaurant to a minimum. Really? Nothing helped. If it happens in a restaurant, be sure to alert the waitstaff (and tip them phenomenally!!!) I would clean up as much as I could and then they'd always assure me it was OK (God bless them!) ...to go out to my car and find dad sitting in MY seat...sigh...when he was in the hospital (which he was many times) they had him in depends. Always. Away from there, he insisted on wearing "thong" style underwear....which were totally useless. Dad never had dementia, but a very strong will and it was useless to argue with him on this point. I will agree that sorbitol, the fake sweetener used in a lot of "sugar free" foods will clean you out in a heartbeat if you are sensitive to them.

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Bowel incontinence shouldn't necessarily mean the person has constant diarrhea. These are two separate issues.

Some good suggestions are given in previous answers, but of course it's tricky business to control the timing of bowel movements. Side effects of medications and supplements are factors, in addition to diet.

Information about medications can be found in the papers that come with the prescriptions and also online. Regarding diet, you can research individual foods. However trial and error probably is the only way to find what works for each individual.

For reasons related to her dementia, I no longer take my 97-year-old mother out to public places. But the challenge remains to keep her regular without either constipation or runny movements. We discontinued a medication that caused diarrhea. And I have researched and experimented with foods.

For example, peanut butter can be constipating. And almond butter has the opposite effect -- goes right through you. Mom loves her breakfast waffle with nut butter and chocolate chips and we've settled on cashew butter because it seems neutral in terms on bowel impact. If she skips a couple days having a bowel movement, I switch to almond butter until we get results.

Also I use prune juice to help her go, substituting it for the cranberry juice she usually gets to promote urinary health. The juice is given every six hours with liquid children's Tylenol mixed in (for arthritis and other aches and pains) and also Gatorade for the electrolytes -- all this in a four-ounce juice glass. The first juice of the day also includes her liquid multi-vitamin.

If her movements get runny and that continues throughout the day, I give her one 30-ml dose of Imodium and then wait for results. More than that causes constipation in her case.

As everyone reading this probably knows, there’s no such thing as ‘control’ in the care of a dependent elderly person. Seems like just as soon as I get a problem figured out, something changes. So my response includes blessings for a reasonably successful outcome in dealing with this challenge. Good luck.

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MY HUSBAND'S GASTROLOGST PRESCRIBED CHOLESTYRAMINE POWDER. I use one scoop in water twice a day. Really, really makes a difference for him (and me).

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Talk w/ pharmacist & dietician to rule out drug/drug and drug/food interaction & / or intolerance. Have you tried a "Fleet" (sodium phosphate) enema to clean out before trips outside? Ask MD if okay, first. They are easy to administer, work quickly.

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I found that Splenda (sucralose) sets off the lower digestive system. Journal what he eats and check labels for contents.

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Charcoal liners do help, and we used plastic-lined overpants over the Depends for extra protection on outings to seal it just in case. A thin disposable pad can go on his seat too if you're worried at all about the seats. The kind for nighttime incontinence work great in the car. For inside we used fabric ones intended for infants in car seats that were beige, only about 12" and very subtle. People thought it was just a little cushion for his comfort if they saw it at all. Prune juice in the am helped with regularity. Warm for taste. Raisins too. And a dose of humility for anyone who is intolerant enough to make you or him feel bad about it. Try to keep him enjoying life as much as he can. I've managed clean up in places I never would have imagined. Armed with a sense of "oh well" and a fashionable backpack smaller than many womens' handbags which held a change of pants, a travel pack of big wet wipes, travel sized hand sanitizer, and a gallon sized ziplock bag let my grandparents and then my parents enjoy things long after others would have shut down. Family restrooms and non-gender specific restrooms are more common now in public too, and nicer restaurants usually have a separate staff restroom, so maybe select restaurants with those in mind just in case it does happen. Applause to you for looking for solutions and not giving up! I found many, many more people were kind and helpful than judgmental.

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I agree that it would be wise to check his meds. Perhaps one of them is causing the bowel problems. This could be the easiest fix.

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Just know where every bathroom is when you're out and he gets there in time, sits on the toilet and goes.

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Yes, artificial sweetners do this especially the one they use in chocolate. I took Mom off coffee and fruit juices and the problem has practically gone away. I give u a lot of credit. If this was regular accurance I don't think I could take my parent out.

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Chocolate in itself can bother some people.

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I give mom 4oz of prune juice everynight and her crushed pills in prune pudding that i make. Mornings are 4 oz coffee with 1.5 teaspoons of miralax. She then has her breakfast and by 3 hours i put her on the toilet snd she goes. Shes done for the day, so the sooner i get the miralax coffee in her the better. Good luck

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If he is Diabetic talk to your doctor about the meds. I have a rather crabby bowel and I cannot take cholesterol meds or oral Diabetic medicine anymore. I still have my moments yet it's not like when I was on the meds. I was so bad I could not leave the house safely. When I went anywhere I carried emergency wipes, extra clothing and bags. I was always trying to see where the restrooms were. Sometimes the meds that are suppose to help may actually cause a worse problem. I have some success with fiber powder. Diet may be an issue for some people. One of our sons cannot eat ANY product with a corn product in it. So check on the diet and also the balance of fluid against food. I always have Lactaid pills on me. Sometimes Imodium is too much, sometimes Benadryl helps. I have been living with this in some form since my early 20's - it's only since my mid 40's that with the advent of diabetes & cholesterol meds that it became unmanageable - I truly dread getting much older and not being able to manage this by myself. I find it completely embarrassing and don't usually share this problem with others. Yet at my current age I am between the position of the caregiver and the patient. I wish someone in senior medicine would figure this one out. Is there any kind of a sensor much like those used for children who have nighttime incontinence? Is there a time frame after meals where you husband can be guided to the bathroom - like 40 minutes after? 30? Good luck!

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My mother sees a doctor here in Pittsburgh who prescribes a powder (resin) called Cholestyramine that we mix with 8 oz. of liquid (I use coconut almond milk and shake it vigorously to make it frothy like a milkshake.) The medication/powder absorbs the liquid in one's colon to clump the waste together so that fecal leakage (incontinence) doesn't occur. She takes this 2 times per day. Take your husband to a doctor that specializes in colon issues.

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My elderly mother wears diapers, too. She had both issues: bowel and urinary incontinence and now only suffers from urinary incontinence. I discovered her bowel issues were due to her diet and in working with our naturopath, we pinpointed the type of foods that caused her bowels to become an issue. If you live in a state that recognizes naturopaths - go to one ASAP. Naturopaths are licensed as primary care physicians where we live (AZ) and their clinical training is exactly the same as a traditional doctor. The big difference between the two fields is that naturopaths receive an additional year of training in natural medicine - but they are trained in conventional though they don't prescribe traditional medications; for example, I'm on a cholesterol-lowering supplement through our naturopath but she is also trained in how Lipitor works. The smell in your husband's "output" is a strong signal that his body is not tolerating a certain food, a group of foods, or the timing of food groups eaten together, so his meal just ferments (sorry to sound so graphic!) in his gut, while waiting to be expelled. The fermented food is the "smell" you smell. Surprisingly, one can live for decades with a very minor food intolerance and/or minor food allergy - and not even realize it was that food that was causing problem(s) until the actual food was removed from the diet. My recommendation is to keep a food journal, keep an eye on what he's eating and note when the bowel issue happen. You may be able to see right away a pattern developing and work from there to correct the problem. I discovered (through a lot of trial and error) my mother had difficulty processing all complex carbs (grains, dairy, certain types of beans, white sugar, etc) and after putting her on a diet very, very similar to Paleo, her bowels were no longer an issue. Prior to this change, her "output" smelled horrendous! It smelled like a combination of rotten eggs, gasoline, and licorice. I was very close to buying a gas mask to wear whenever I had to change her. Good luck!

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I have IBS..Take Cholestyramine for Oral Suspension USP it works fine for me and I have had some terrible situations that could have been very uncomfortable for me.It can be subscribe by your PCP comes in 9G pouch contains 4 grams of the above ingrediants ..IT works I take One in the AM and one in the PM.

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My husband enjoys getting out, seeing others, and eating out at a nice restaurant. However, the problem is bowel incontinence. Advice?

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