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this happens at night. Im so tired. My husband is 27 years older than I am and I still workfull time. And also why does it take so long to get benefits from the Veterans administration for attendent aid?Its hard to find resources to help bridge the gap financially.

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Charlotte, your profile says that your hubby has Alzheimer's/Dementia, and the part about blaming others for stealing is a stage of the disease. To learn about all the different stages so you can plan what might happen next, click on this link https://www.agingcare.com/articles/Stages-of-Alzheimers-disease-118964.htm
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I was going to offer that my mom went through the "stealing" her clothes stage when she had a room mate. The nursing home would label their clothes and she started saying, I don't remember this shirt or whatever. Same stuff she thought they were "stealing" she later claimed she didn't know where it came from....wasn't sure it was hers!
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You need to have the area agency on aging near you come do an in-home assessment. If I had a loved one at that stage in my home, I would start looking for a placement. It is physically impossible to do dementia care AND work another job full time. At the very least, you're going to need some in-home night time help from a home health care service.

Dementia only gets worse and worse, very unpredictably.

I say this having been through it with my 78 year old mother, having a professional career that is at least full time, teenagers, volunteer job, family, etc. You can't do this alone.
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It is called losing one's inhibition. We no longer have self-control, so whatever we think or feel or worry about we say--or sing. Dementia patients lose track of time, so day and night mean nothing to them. I agree with sandwich42plus. You need an in-home assessment from the Area on Aging and plans for out of home placement.You can't do this alone--she may live getting more difficult for the next 9 years as my husband did!
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