My mother's short term memory has been gone for several years and now a chronic uti has scramble what is left of her long term memory. She still lives alone in a house that I bought and paid for and cannot live with me. She is abusive and mentally crazy and always has been. She now calls my phone repeatedly 40 to 60 times a day. I have had knee replacement surgery and can't take care of her right now anyway. My blood pressure, which is normal was 167/113 yesterday because of her. She definitely has show timers. She is super hateful to me but sweet as puddin and pie to everyone else. She has let a drunk strange man into her house lately, took in 2 stray cats that are full of fleas and unvaccinated, and answered the door naked recently. So if I tell the hospital it's an unsafe discharge and refuse to answer their calls, what will they do? P.s. Google a "Karen" and her picture will come up. Help
Do not pick her up! Let the hospital social worker handle this. She is an unsafe discharge. Tell them that you cannot take her on.
Please take care of your own health and get meds for that blood pressure.
Is that man still in the home she lives in, ask him to leave. If he won't call the police to have him removed. Get the locks changed. The cats, if you are where its getting warmer now, put them outside. Leave food and water and shelter. Call Humane society to see if they will take them.
They may deem her competent to go home on her own, which you can't stop.
If she is allowed home again, do not go over there to do anything to help her "live independently". She will succumb to some accident or medical emergency and land in the hospital again. Or in the morgue. If she is declared mentally competent, then she can live as she chooses.
If she IS NOT mentally competent, as you contend, you should insist on getting an evaluation by a neurologist who can make a diagnosis of her cognitive function. Then, the hospital can not send her home alone without a care plan.
They MUST discharge her however. They can't just keep her there indefinitely.
You can meet with a hospital social worker or discharge planner and arrange for her to be transferred to a memory care facility or skilled nursing facility. They probably won't be able to recommend one, you might have to go and visit a few and choose the best option for your mother's needs.
If you don't want to be involved, you can ask APS to intervene and get a guardian assigned by the court. They will take over your mother's finances and determine a placement for her. You will not have any say.
I have financially supported her lock stock and barrel for the last 24 years and im just emotionally done. I cant heal for having to deal with her. Ps we don't have cabs where I live. Guess they will have to transport her by ambulance if they send her home. Dont know who is going to pay for all these ambulance rides and she has had at least 4 or 5 since January. It won't be me