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My father had sent my mother a set of china and some Hummel figurines when he was in Germany while in the Army many years ago. She recently passed away and he is in assisted living. They have been sitting in my basement for a few years and I have no interest in keeping it all, but feel guilty for wanting to hand it all off to any antique dealer or where ever. And I should add that both of my parents' choice was to not have a close relationship with me since childhood, so I guess that also plays into having no interest. I have no other siblings. What do I do?

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When we cleared out my mom's house of more than 50 years, I took most of the big stuff to Goodwill. (I know some folks don't like them because of executive compensation, but they run a program for folks with disabilities to help them get back into the work force. My husband was unemployed for 2 1/2 years during the Recession and they helped him get back to work.)

I left a lot of stuff (things that had memories for me)--mom's creche, old vases, kitchen bowls--out in front, where folks could pick them up. Pretty soon, there were cars stopping and nice folks getting out and picking up stuff to take home with huge smiles on their faces. An middle aged Hispanic woman cradled mom's creche in her arms; I could see it was going to be loved.

Let someone else make good memories from your mom's tchotchkes.
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Abby2018 May 2022
Goodwill....is just that...a business that promotes good will. I have no problem with them and the compensation for executives. They support the community, re-use items that would be otherwise thrown away and are a godsend for those with limited resources. I also do the curbside freebie piles....and let's always keep in mind....one person's trash, is another's treasure :)
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My elderly Aunts in FL were avid crafters and sewers (now 100 and 103). Their now deceased older sister lived next door to them in FL and my cousin now owns that house. My 3 Aunties all made and collected DOLLS. Yes, dolls. Dolls of all sizes, shapes, colors, nationalities, and ages, with a variety of unnatural expressions on their creepy little faces and watchful beady eyes...everywhere, in every room in both houses. I'm flying down there tomorrow and I won't go to sleep without relocating them into various closets and even the garage. Putting bags over them. Whatever it takes. The minute my Aunties transition into heaven the dolls will be going straight to hell. every. last. one.
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Jhalldenton May 2022
I hate dolls and always have and I chuckled at the thought of sending dolls to hell. Thanks for the chuckled..... What is your method of sending those creepy a** dolls to meet Lucifer?
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You have no interest in keeping them. And you don’t understand the word guilt.
You will feel sad not guilty. And even sad is misplaced.

Perhaps you are stymied because by letting those items go you'll be letting go of a pretend relationship. Why you keep souvenirs of people who didn’t care about you is a great curiosity.  Free yourself.

Have you heard that commercial that goes something like - Hey ladies, why are you keeping that engagement ring given to you by the guy who ditched you. It’s full of bad vibes. Get rid of it.

Don't even keep one cake dish from the set. It's keeping something dark. You’re just pretending you had a good relationship. They represent yearning. It’s your parents that missed out. Those things are weights. They’re hurtful reminders. Get free of them. Give them away.

As for Hummels, omg. They make me think of Norman Rockwell dishes, agggh. Young people are so removed from that era. And it will never ever be in style again.

Do you skeet shoot? Some cultures believe in warding off evil spirits by breaking dishes during a party. Opa!
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NoLife May 2022
You're so right! Just finished clearing my mother's house for sale after placing her in MC. I've had such guilt over getting rid of her treasures, actually very nice things. But as you said they represent yearning. They are hurtful reminders. Get rid of them. I did get rid of most of them. Now I'm going to clear out the rest. Thanks
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I got rid of everything my parents had that I didn't want. It was all just material items I didn't want, had no memories for me, and was just sitting in a box. I would get rid of everything that you don't want.
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For myself having "stuff" from my parent's house and now I am downsizing the stuff in my own house, I found donating items to rummage sales where the money goes to a good cause was very rewarding.
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Give them to someone who would love and appreciate them. That's what I would do, in any case. Whether sold by a dealer or given away they will move into the home of someone who will treasure and value them. Things should be loved, displayed,appreciated. That someone pays for them only adds to it all as they scrimped and saved to add one more to their collection, perhaps, and was thrilled to choose the one just right for them. Enjoy that they move on to new life and appreciation. It matters not a whit if you make money off them or not. If your Mom was of a frugal nature she would appreciate their value.
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Get rid of it. It meant something to your Mom but as said our kids won't want it. I collected dolls and English houses and Longaberger baskets. Now I wonder why. And those baskets are going for a fraction of what they were purchased for. Some of my dolls I donated to Chinese auctions at the Church. My one daughter may use the houses, but I am sure the other one won't. She would live in a tiny house if she could.

I give things away. If it ends up being worth something, someone else can make the profit. When I cleaned Moms house out, I only kept a few things. One of them I just gave a friend who was close to Mom. You just can't keep everything. Its a shame the amount of money people spent on China and Crystal. And now, our children do not want it. It doesn't fit in their lifestyle. My oldest, I bought her a set of Pfaltzgraff with serving pieces. Thats all she uses. If she has a crowd its good paper plates.

Time to part with them.
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Kitty, figurines are clutter and younger folks flat do NOT want them. Artisan Pottery & glassworks maybe, if they actually have a home.
Also on the Hummels unless you have paperwork to show provenance from 1940’s, they aren’t worth much. There was a Hummel trend in the 80’s? and lots of them sold. It may have been Bradford Exchange type of “collectible” sold which are basically garbage now. But it muddled up the market for them.

Ceramics! and more Ceramics! 4 out of 5 Aunts & my mom did ceramics. Couple of kilns in the family too. Ton of ceramics! Maybe 6 pieces which I kept out of dz’s. But all the other ones (boxes & boxes of stuff in bubble wrap from Xmas ornaments to ring holders) I put into a plastic bin and broke them. I used the shards in the bottom of planters to help with drainage. I was repotting last month and low & behold there was bits of ceramic Easter eggs and the spike of a ring holder and parts of ash trays. I know it sounds odd, but unearthing them gave me a sense of calmness, like mom & Aunties enjoying a garden 🪴
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Oh, the Hummels!! I could weep. Mother has a large collection and inherited all her mother's Hummels and several of her MIL's too.

Mother made it a big thing that they were worth a lot of money. Actually, they're not, and while I know she has split them up amongst the great grands-I can state emphatically that no one wants them. They are not my taste and I would probably have to display them out of 'guilt'. IDK.

I think that once she passes, we'll have a quick look over of her stuff and most of it will be sold at an estate sale and the rest will go to GoodWill. It would break her heart, but she is the kind of person who equates 'owning' something with the person who gave it to her. She doesn't have relationships with people, she has the junk they gave her.

I've asked my kids to please stop giving me 'stuff', as I am trying to cull down 'things'.
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"I want an organ for my home!" said no one since the 1970s.
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Shadow67 May 2022
Hahahaha
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