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On several occasions her mother has turned on the electric range and started small fires when my friend was home. Her mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's.

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I'm not sure I understand what you mean by the "best way" to tell her. I assume as friends you have a language in common. How do you talk to her about other things?

You might start out more generally. "You know, persons with dementia reach a point where they cannot be safely left alone at all, not even for a half an hour. That is really such a big burden for the caregiver." If you have any personal experience along these lines insert it. If you can offer any specific help, insert the offer. "Would it help if I stayed with your mom two hours on Thursdays so you could run errands?" or "If you can make a detailed list, I'll do your grocery shopping when I do mine."

In certain levels of friendship it would work to say, "I'm really sorry to say this, but it seems to me your mother has reached the point of needing someone with her all the time." In other kinds of relationships a direct statement telling the friend what to do may not go over so well. Then more gentle hints might work best.

Be gentle. Be polite. Be sympathetic. If you possibly can, offer help.

Perhaps tell your friend about this website.

If you are asking whether you should tell your friend, yes, I think could be a kind gesture from a true friend.
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Your friend needs to wake up and smell the coffee, or possibly the house burning down. This lady needs 24/7 supervision or facilty care. At least disconnect the d*mn stove.
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My 90 yr. old mom has lived with me for five years and today is my first day on this sight. Boy, what a relief to know that I am not alone. I share with all of you the frustration, loneliness, fear, pain and, yes, joy. There are times when you just have to laugh (like when I told mom it is time for her shower and she came into the kitchen buck naked) because if you don't, you really will fall apart. Before my mom moved in, she too was burning food in her stove. I warned her then that if it continued I would UNPLUG the stove. Then she came to live with me, and fortunately she was too confused to figure out how to turn my stove on. But one time she left a sauce pan out and when I asked her about it she replied "I had to cook the top ramen". Although she really didn't cook anything at all. But it frightened me so much I told her very passionately that I will not allow her to destroy my home and everything I've worked for or to injure my dog, who she adores, and I will move her into a nursing home faster then she can turn around if she ever even tries to use that stove. I was intense. I asked her if she understood because she just stares with eyes glazed over, and she did. She's never touched the stove since. Or so far. You may not have a loved one that you could trust even when they say "I'll never do it again" but I'm thankful that I do. She's used the microwave to heat soup or chile and that confirms it. I always have food that she can just grab and eat. That helps a lot. I'm also fortunate that my mom is very compliant and very very grateful.
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I'm glad you asked how and not if. But you said your friend was home so this is happening on her watch? Is she the one telling you about the fires? Could she remove the knobs until she is ready to cook or secure the kitchen in some other way? Put an alarm on the door?
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Is your friend not aware that there have been fires on the stove? That would seem to be a big alert that more care is needed.
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Arianne, I'm going to assume that you are good friends with her or you would not be asking this question or for help from all of the great caregivers on this site. If she told you that her mom has started several fires or burned pots please follow the advice that has been given and tell your friend that her mother needs NOT to be able to use the stove/oven/microwave/electric pot or whatever as it is just to dangerous to everyone. My mom had Alz. and burned up at least 3 microwaves re-heating her coffee, she burnt at least as many pots on the stove when she decided to try and cook! My dad and I disconnected the fuse that ran to the stove and the microwave so everything looked normal they just wouldn't work. We also got rid of the electric teapot she had, hid the mixer and any other electric item that she could hurt herself or others with. You just need to be honest with your friend, if you like use my mom as an example. My mom stayed home with my dad and I throughout her 'battle' with Alz. She died here at home. But just like with an infant we had to secure the house so she could not hurt herself or us by burning down the house or poisoning us with 'strange' ingredients in the food. This disease is so awful. We told her that she had spent enough of her life cooking and cleaning and that it was now time to rest. We would take care of all of this for her and we did. We took really good care of her and there came a point when she no longer was a danger as the Alz. had robbed her of her ability to walk or talk or even recognize us. Your friend needs to keep her mom safe and you are a great friend for trying to help! Blessings to all of you! Lindaz.
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Arianne777, I will also add that a person with dementia cannot be relied upon to tell you if they are using the stove or not. They may promise that they won't do it, but they forget and do it anyway. They forget what they said, promised or did, so their verbal commitment cannot be relied upon. They brain renders them incapable of keeping promises or accurately reporting what they do.
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Thank you, jeannegibbs and Windyridge, for your helpful advice.
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I'm going to mention something that hasn't been mentioned before.....your friend KNOWS her Mom doesn't need to be alone. But she's scared. She's scared of what to do, how this is going to affect her, how Mom will react, etc. You would have to be a moron these days not to know a little something about Alzheimers/dementia. So, she knows. I'll give you an example. My Mom never drove so totally relied on my Dad. After Dad was diagnosed with Alzheimers and as his disease progressed she refused to think that he couldn't drive, because, you see, if he couldn't drive what would she do??? Not selfish....just survival denial. One day he left to run an errand to a place he had literally been thousands of times--his old work place. I received a panicked call from Mom telling me he was missing. He had been gone half a day and she was worried sick. She had called his old work place and he had been gone over 2 hours. I was jumping in my car to go try to find him when she called and said he had just turned in the driveway. After that, she decided he could only drive when she was with him. Then one day I asked them to follow me to the mechanic so I could leave my car. This was a place we had been to many, many times. Mom said he would be fine and I’ll have to admit I thought as long as he was following me there wouldn’t be a problem. But, when I turned my blinker on to turn, he turned a block earlier than he was supposed to. And when he tried to correct it, he drove on the wrong way on the wrong side of the highway. Scared the you-know-what out of me. When we got home I told Mom what happened and that he shouldn’t drive at all, even with her in car. Still, she couldn’t hear it. I don’t know what happened to change her mind because she never said, but it wasn’t long until she began asking me to do the driving for them. I share this just to say this is a very hard and scary place to be for your friend. As you tell her that her Mom needs help know that she may not want to hear it. And, as her friend, as time goes by all you can do is gently encourage her to do the right thing. She’ll hear it when she can. Sad to say but true.
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Arianne, this is happeing with a family I know. My friend J took care of her mother before she died. Jan and husband are retired with health problems of their own. Husbands sister has never left home, still works at age 68. Her Mom owns the house and is living there. (Js MIL) Mom/MIL has been diagnoised with Dementia. SIL has been told that Mom will need supervision sooner or later. Even with no Dementia the elderly can forget to drink and eat. The brain no longer sends the signals. Worsebwith Dementia. MIL could be in the hospital for dyhydration. That makes Dementia worse. SIL refuses to retire and brother has been asked to back off. What I'm trying to say, is your friend is in denial. And because of that ay not listen until too late.
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