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My 89 year old mom in in rehab. She has made 3 trips to hospital due to urinary and kidney problems. May need to keep a catheter in the rest of her life. Dad was WW2 vet and we have started the process of getting some financial help. Mom is on SS and small pension from dad's work. A family member has made an offer to try to keep her in home (they are in medical field). If they get VA help will they be able to pay a family member to help with her care. The family member could use the money and would have to give up some of her work that she is doing on part time basis. This is so hard. Not sure she may not end up in a nursing home and then we have to find one that takes Medicaid pending.

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The safest way to do this is through the agency she works for. Here in NY we have an agency called Hanci. They often hire family members as caregivers. They provide some basic training specific to that patient and pay the caregiver. Hanci paid my MIL to care for my FIL. After he passed, she continued to work part time caring for others.
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The relative is in a medical field but not a home health care position. Are there restrictions on who can be paid by VA under surviving spouse benefits?
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You can pay your relative, but then you have to do the payroll reports to the state and federal employment dept's for taxes and withholding and comp insurance and unemployment insurance and get an EIN#. A regular pain in the neck.
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