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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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About a week ago, FIL would not get out of bed even with fecal incontinence. There were three family members trying to get him to change his mind including my muscular SO. However FIL said no, and SO then had to take mom to her doctors.
It turns out that FIL had a pelvic fracture that went undiagnosed in the ER as he'd hit his head. The fault for this, get this, is now on the paid caregiver who is assigned to sleep on a separate floor for their privacy (they have a room downstairs) and accessible only if they elect to call her at 4 in the morning. They blame her behind her back, but they also depend on her hugely.
The indy asked and was authorized to scoot on home today but when she did, that's exactly when MIL fell on her steps and almost hit her head were it not for SO who just happened to be right there. Now they're mad at the indy.
I would read the posts of BurntCaregiver who has done both agency and indy successfully. You have to set boundaries really early as to what is and isn't your responsibily.
Would it help if you could tell the client he/she needs to be out of bed for just a few minutes while the bedding is changed, or perhaps that the mattress needs to be turned? Then once they are up, use the "soft persuasion" method of special breakfast, looking out the window to see the birds, "bribery" as bundleofjoy suggests. If the client uses a recliner during the day, perhaps tell him/her that they can have a nice nap in the recliner. Does this person literally want to stay in bed all day or just get up on their own schedule? My brother in law who's in a nursing hime has always been a night owl and late riser, and the place where he resides is very good about letting residents follow theior own rhythms with regard to bed time, getting up time, even meals to some extent.
More info is needed: how old is this person? Does this person have any cognitive or memory issues? Does this person have any recent illnesses or injuries? I'm assuming this is a private client living in their own home...
Several years ago my MIL (in her early 80s) went into AL, and started losing her balance and tipping over, then not being able to get herself up (and she weighed 185+ lbs). Even though she wasn't injured, she had a stint in rehab. She was not very compliant with the PT and we knew if she didn't gain back her strength and balance, she'd go into LTC. Also, PT would end if she didn't progress. At the same time she was sliding into early dementia and already had short term memory loss. She then started to refuse to get out of bed. The facility admin was very good about trying to incentivize her but to no avail. She is actually very healthy but now is a 2-person assist and requires a Hoyer lift and use of a wheelchair. You must have tempered expectations for this client, especially if they are very advanced in age.
There are so many possibilities. You do not give any information to go on so it is impossible to narrow down answers. Fill out your profile or add to your question giving more information.
What action could you take? It would depend on their doctor and the person who pays you.
If you know them to be ambulatory prior to your taking the position, I would contact the person who hired me and report it after ruling out a few things…
Keep a daily log in case this is a pattern. How long have you worked for your client? If this is a one day deal? Are they frightened of you? Are they going to the bathroom? Eating? Taking fluids? Have you taken their vitals? Are they reading, watching tv? Stayed up all night? Drinking alcohol? Moaning? Asleep? Awake? Have you checked to see if they have fallen, scrapes, bruises?
My aunt did this sometimes and I let her be after checking her out. It was not alarming to me. She has dementia. Has always “gone to bed” when she felt bad.
If my mom did this, I would be hustling her out the door to the ER. She NEVER stayed in bed unless she was in the hospital.
You posted under New to Caregiving. So welcome to the forum. We will be happy to help but as you see, we need more info.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
It turns out that FIL had a pelvic fracture that went undiagnosed in the ER as he'd hit his head. The fault for this, get this, is now on the paid caregiver who is assigned to sleep on a separate floor for their privacy (they have a room downstairs) and accessible only if they elect to call her at 4 in the morning. They blame her behind her back, but they also depend on her hugely.
The indy asked and was authorized to scoot on home today but when she did, that's exactly when MIL fell on her steps and almost hit her head were it not for SO who just happened to be right there. Now they're mad at the indy.
I would read the posts of BurntCaregiver who has done both agency and indy successfully. You have to set boundaries really early as to what is and isn't your responsibily.
Tip: document, document, document. Whatever action you take, write it down.
we have this problem every day (but not in a bad way — my LO just wants some minutes more to sleep).
however, the caregiver has a schedule. so every day, we have to convince my LO.
some days, instead of a real shower, the caregiver gives a sponge bath in bed. my LO is very glad because this way, my LO continues sleeping.
and then my LO gets up with the help of the caregiver. breakfast, etc.
i hope the person you’re helping can be convinced in a soft way. tempted with delicious breakfast waiting. bribery, something.
Several years ago my MIL (in her early 80s) went into AL, and started losing her balance and tipping over, then not being able to get herself up (and she weighed 185+ lbs). Even though she wasn't injured, she had a stint in rehab. She was not very compliant with the PT and we knew if she didn't gain back her strength and balance, she'd go into LTC. Also, PT would end if she didn't progress. At the same time she was sliding into early dementia and already had short term memory loss. She then started to refuse to get out of bed. The facility admin was very good about trying to incentivize her but to no avail. She is actually very healthy but now is a 2-person assist and requires a Hoyer lift and use of a wheelchair. You must have tempered expectations for this client, especially if they are very advanced in age.
Fill out your profile or add to your question giving more information.
If you know them to be ambulatory prior to your taking the position, I would contact the person who hired me and report it after ruling out a few things…
Keep a daily log in case this is a pattern. How long have you worked for your client? If this is a one day deal? Are they frightened of you? Are they going to the bathroom? Eating? Taking fluids? Have you taken their vitals? Are they reading, watching tv? Stayed up all night? Drinking alcohol? Moaning? Asleep? Awake? Have you checked to see if they have fallen, scrapes, bruises?
My aunt did this sometimes and I let her be after checking her out. It was not alarming to me. She has dementia. Has always “gone to bed” when she felt bad.
If my mom did this, I would be hustling her out the door to the ER. She NEVER stayed in bed unless she was in the hospital.
You posted under New to Caregiving. So welcome to the forum. We will be happy to help but as you see, we need more info.