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She uses the bathroom on herself all day, and refuses to clean it up or want help. That it's becoming a biohazard.

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You need to call APS or 911 and get her admitted to a psychiatric facility.

This behavior is so unacceptable when living in someone else's house.

If she was living alone APS would intervene for self neglect. You don't want them saying you are negligent in her care, so call and ask for help before someone else does.

If she just wants to give up and die, well, that is her choice but, NOT in front of your children.
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Your profile says that your mom is only 66 years old. That's awful young to be having incontinence issues, and mobility issues. And the fact that you have your 4 children living in the "biohazard" along with yourself and your "man" tells me that mom has got to go.
If she can't care for herself, then she can move into an assisted living facility, using her money of course. And if money is an issue she will have to apply for Medicaid and look for a facility that accepts that.
6 years is an awful long time to be mourning her husband. It has to be more than that. Has she been diagnosed with depression, and is she on any kind of antidepressants? If not, make sure she gets in to see her doctor so that issue can be addressed.
You now have to do what's best for you and your children, and if that means mom has to leave then so be it. No child should be raised in that kind of filth.
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I agree this needs to be escalated & intervention is required.

Is her depression treated? With therapy, exercise & medication? Is her diabetes well controlled?

Has there been a recent checkup on her mental & physical health?

If not, what are the barriers stoping this?

Have you discussed this issue, the mess, your concerns with her?

What does she say?
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