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I am the primary caregiver for my husband and brother.
They need diabetic care, medication, diabetic meals. They can dress and do hygiene and have not fallen recently.
What can I do to prepare for the day when I cannot care for them?
They make just enough money to not qualify for anything apparently.
Do I need to call 3 ambulances if heaven forbid it came to that and just hope I can refuse unsafe care for them?

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You pretty much do if there is no support system for you. In fact you should have instructions in your wallet that there are two senior adults at home who are in danger without 24/7 care. This will notify the system if you go to the ER unable to communicate. This truly does constitute an emergency. Social Services would have to step in and place your parents in care until your recovery. Something we should ALL think about in covid-19 times.
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Have you ever looked into a "Miller Trust"?

This allows a person who makes too much for Medicaid to get around that. Just a thought.
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