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We were infomed about 2 weeks ago that she had lost 10 lbs in 2 months, her appetite was barely there and she was becoming weaker. They suggested hospice.
Her 2 sons ate Christmas dinner with her at a special facility event this Tuesday, she started hospice on Wednesday, and we were called out of church this morning that her heart rate was 30 and her breathing was labored. My son in Chicago happened to come into town yesterday, so he was there, as was my local son, and his son (my grandson). We looped in my other brother-in-law in Tucson with FaceTime.
When we got there her eyes were half open but not really tracking, her breathing was abnormal, and she wasn't really responsive but we felt she could hear us, as at one point a tear rolled from her eye while her sons were crying and talking to her. We feel she was waiting for all 3 sons to be "present" then she very gently and quietly passed. She wasn't on meds for pain. She didn't seem to be in pain, thankfully.
The staff was wonderful: they brought food for us, consoled us, told us stories about her, they came in and out saying their farewells to her since she'd been there for 7 years total, the Chaplain came in several times and waited with us for the Cremation Society to come get her. They sent only 1 small young woman so I helped move her onto the gurney.
She was a very nice MIL, a loving Mom and sweet woman who had never harmed a fly. She technically wasn't diagnosed with anything so not sure what took her. Just so so grateful she had as good an exit as it gets.
Last time I saw her was on Thanksgiving, eating and laughing together so it feels surreal to me that she's gone.
Jesus was her Lord and Savior, so although surprised and sad, we are celebrating her liberation from her worn-out, sick, earthly body and she now in the presence of her loving God.
"In the resurrection scheme of things, this has to happen: everything perishable taken off the shelves and replaced by the imperishable, this mortal replaced by the immortal. Then the saying will come true:
Death swallowed by triumphant Life! Who got the last word, oh, Death? Oh, Death, who’s afraid of you now?"
1 Corinthians 15:54-55 (The Message version)

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I'm sorry to read of your loss Geaton, it always feels more difficult to lose someone at this time of year.
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Reply to cwillie
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So sorry for your loss. A very beautiful, peaceful passing for your MIL. You described it so well. I believe she is with our Lord and Savior.
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Reply to JanPeck123
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So sorry for your loss, Geaton. (((hugs))).
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Reply to Hothouseflower
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My condolences to you. When I got the call about my mother a year and a half ago I was asleep as it was around 1 in the morning. I didn't feel I could handle seeing her as she had been suffering greatly. I admire your courage.

I will always wonder how her end was. I had seen her 2 days before and planned to go in the afternoon on the day she passed. You are blessed to have experienced what seems to be a peaceful end. I hope you find peace during times ahead.
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Reply to Riverdale
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Geaton, you have painted an amazing word picture of love and family and the gentle transition from one life to another. I know the Lord will give your family peace and moments of joy over the coming days as you share memories together.
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Reply to graygrammie
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Sorry for your Loss Geaton .
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Reply to KNance72
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So sorry for your loss.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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So sorry for your family to lose such a sweet woman. It's good she went peacefully, surrounded by her three sons. Take care.
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Reply to ArtistDaughter
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((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Geaton)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


So sorry for your loss, Geaton.

She is at peace.
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Reply to cover9339
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So sorry Geaton, she is in good hands, may she rest in peace.
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Reply to MeDolly
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We can all only hope our own passing is as peaceful. I know your heart is full. She was blessed to have you and her family around her.
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Reply to Suzy23
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I’m so sorry for your loss…At this time of year it seems more complicated too. But Im glad it was a pretty peaceful passing and fairly rapid. Sending you huge hugs
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Reply to Madisoncuckoo7
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I’m glad to seemed to be easy for her. Thinking of you all.
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Reply to Bulldog54321
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Geaton777,
So sorry for your loss.
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Reply to Evamar
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Thank you all to my very special Forum Family, the ones who know all-too-well about pain and suffering, loss and grief. I realized I didn't cry at all yesterday and woke up wondering if I'm a freak, but then as I started reading your condolences the tears finally came. The tears are also for what I know is coming for my own Mom and Aunt... with their advanced ages it probably won't be too far away.

I forgot to add in my main post that my Chicago son said when he was sitting in front of her (just him) she was at first looking at him, then seemed to be distracted by "someone" behind him and he said her eyes got wide. My hubs and I were the only ones there at that point, and not in the room. My son is not a particularly religious or spiritual adult so I found this incident interesting. Tucking it away to ponder it in my heart.

I feel grateful for the "preparation" my MIL has inadvertently provided for me, an only child (and she was one, also).

Again, thank you all for blessing me with your sincere and supportive comments.

Merry Christmas and may your New Year be filled with joy, peace and good health!
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Reply to Geaton777
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My condolences. Your honor of her was touching.
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Reply to AMZebbC
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Geaton77 I'm so sorry for your loss.
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Reply to Scampie1
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Geaton,

So sorry to see this. We know it is coming but still so unexpected. I’m glad her sons were able to have a holiday meal with her and that you saw her Thanksgiving. such lovely support.

What a visual you painted. The Chaplain and the men all gathered and you and the one small woman moving your MIL’s body onto the gurney.

Wishing you and your family peace and happy memories.
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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(((Geaton)))) I am thankful, for your family's sake, that your MIL passed away relatively easily, surrounded by her children. I'm glad for all of you that she had family and celebration time just back at Thanksgiving, where she could enjoy herself and her family could enjoy her company. Condolences, Geaton. 🙏
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Reply to AliBoBali
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Sorry for the loss of such a sweet person.
Love your description, it was touching.
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Reply to Dawn88
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I am very sorry for your loss. I’m glad she went easily and without pain, and thank you for describing this so beautifully.
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Reply to Fawnby
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Geaton - so sorry to hear this, and condolences to you and the family. She is in God's hands now. So sorry to the family for the loss, it is difficult.
Hope you all get through with strength.
Thanks for all your helpful comments to us on the Forum.
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Reply to strugglinson
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Geaton777, my heartfelt sympathy to you and your family. Sounds like Mom-in-law had passed peacefully, just as she had probably planned.
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Reply to freqflyer
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I’m sorry, Geaton.

Thank you for sharing with us.
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Reply to cxmoody
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Geaton, I am so glad her passing was eased.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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So sorry for your loss . She was lucky to have her family looking after her and visiting her , and for a peaceful end of life . May the good memories help give you all peace .
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Reply to waytomisery
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Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry for your unexpected loss, but so happy MILs exit was quick, painless and peaceful. That's a relief. My mother's passing was unexpected too, even though she was 95. She was fine one day, then went into her bed and passed a week later, never waking up again.

Sending you hugs, love and prayers for strength as you grieve this loss.
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Reply to lealonnie1
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So very sorry for your family's loss. Thank you for sharing this and glad it was as peaceful a passing as possible filled with love and family present.
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Reply to casole
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Geaton, thank you for this post and thank you for caring enough about us on the forum to share your wisdom and compassion.
I’m happy your MIL’s journey home was peaceful and that her family was with her at the end. I’m sure she was thankful she had you in her life and I’m thankful you are in mine.
May God bless you for what you brought to her in this world and how you helped ease her into the next.
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Reply to Peasuep
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I am so sorry for you and your family. It sounds as if she had a lovely life, and a blessed end with her family by her side.
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Reply to pamzimmrrt
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