I’m thinking about getting him into a long term bed, hopefully in the same nursing home. I won’t be able to drive for 4/wks total.
I also have been caring for my mother who had a stroke 5yrs. ago. She is also in respite care so I can recuperate.
what are your thoughts about long term care for my husband? He is incontinent, I just went to tab top protective underwear for him.
Thanks
I know, at 62, you're still young and independent. But for how long? This is a good time to make a positive move thinking about your future. Don't wait until a fall down the cellar stairs forces you to move. Or do you want to wait until you have dementia and can't make good decisions? Or maybe you think it will be time when you can no longer control your bladder or bowels or can't get up from the toilet. What will be your sign that you can no longer manage a house independently?
As JustAnon pointed out, it is very risky renting out rooms in your house to strangers! You are especially vulnerable if you are seeking roommates for company or companionship. There are people who will see this and take advantage of you! Just watch an episode or two of "Squatters" on A&E. Yikes!
People who are Not looking to take advantage probably don't want to socialize with you. They just want to mind their own business and privacy.
Here's the good news. If in a month or two, you change your mind, or find it just isn't working out well for him, you can bring him home again! He's not a prisoner there. Try it out and see if this is the right answer.
You might consider making mom's stay permanent as well.
Does the nursing home have a section for Assisted Living or Independent living where you could move to for yourself, and be in close proximity to your husband and mother? It might be nice for all of you to have care as needed, and still be together - just a short walk away.
With that said, I will need a roommate really soon if my husband goes to long term care. I will be alone and I’m not good at that. I will probably need more than one roommate. I have two spare rooms.
The house is paid off, so taxes are about $450 a month. There is nowhere I could live that is cheaper than here.
I'm so sorry for your fall... please make yourself the priority. Do you have any help or family members available to you, even if not local? You need to have a plan for the worst-case scenario, which is something more profound happens to you and are taken out of the picture. What will happen to your husband and Mom?
That way you can get back to just being his loving wife and not his burned out and unhealthy caregiver.
Your mother too needs to get placed long term in a facility so you can just be her loving daughter and not her burned out overwhelmed caregiver.
Brain bleeds are nothing to mess around with and you now need to relinquish your caregiving duties to the caring staff at these facilities where your loved ones will receive the 24/7 they both now require, so you can heal properly.
The long-term care facility will have a whole team of professional aides to take care of husband. His health will continue to decline, and it's best that he be there.
I'm very sorry you're in this situation, and I send best wishes for your own quick recovery.